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From itsmelgp: struggling with purpose… why am I even alive? Who cares either way?


there are always people out there who care, you might just not see them right now. we care, we see you.
thank you for reaching out. you are loved my friend and you matter ! :purple_heart:

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mel - hard to feel like anything you do matters when you’re disconnected from a sense of greater purpose. Moving for the sake of motion wears down the soul. There is only so long you can be eroded before you break. And even then, if you do and you have no purpose, then does it even matter? There is a kind of existential float you experience in places like this. It’s like zero-gravity for the soul. Without some kind of tether, it’s hard to find the fight in you to keep going. It’s easy to just…give up.

I just got out of a season like this. It’s really out-of-body. Hard to be willing to connect your mind to your body. Apathy is such a bitch.

I’m curious for you what has gotten you through seasons like this before? What has given you purpose in the past, and where did you lose it this time?

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@heartsupportwall I just push through because I do what is expected of me… I’m expected to take care of things… I’m expected to carry the weight… unfortunately my second husband who I stupidly thought was my Rock went to prison 3 years ago… now I don’t want to be close to anyone and I stay pretty isolated… unless I’m at a concert… music is my life… without that there’s really not much…I am exhausted inside… it never goes away and people think I’m dark or a whiner… I’m sick of hearing get over it…I can’t…:pensive:

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From Aardvark: he itsmelgp, thank you a lot for sharing and reaching out. that takes strength and courage to do. so
be proud of that. you don’t carry the weight alone. you are not alone in this. isolating yourself will led
to more and more of this toughts. the toughts and worries we keep for ourselves, will haunt us back and don’t to justice to our mood and feelings.
let them out. what is spoken out, what you let out helps you talking helps a lot.
there is a safe place for you, if you want one in our community. be sure and aware
of that. you are loved and you matter. there is so much beauty out there, and music is also for me one
of the most precious things. thank you my friend, take care and feel hugged. :purple_heart

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