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From _previousleon: this is the state I’m currently in. I had a suicide attempt early last year and I’ve done extensive therapy on a weekly basis and I was doing so well but just recently over the last 2 months I’ve been in this state of mind and it’s difficult cuz I have kids but it’s just hard to motivate yourself to do anything. But I think this is a good approach and start with something small. Often times we wanna go big with a big change cuz we know it will make a big impact but that’s when we can get overwhelmed. Thank you guys for the support and for this post it’s gonna help a lot of ppl!
“Often times we wanna go big with a big change cuz we know it will make a big impact but that’s when we can get overwhelmed.” This is so true. So spot on. And it’s a vicious cycle, isn’t it? Too often we will be aware that something isn’t functioning well only when we’re almost hitting rock bottom. For a big struggle, we want to make big changes, initiate a change that would make a real, impactful difference (and hopefully quickly!). But in reality, we may need to give ourselves a lot of grace while we’re trying to get back on our feet.
“One step at a time” can be frustrating to hear when we want so badly to ease the pain, to feel better, to improve our situation… but if we burn ourselves out, we only maintain a cycle of extreme highs and lows in our life. There’s a middle ground to find, a steady pace to create, and in this “in-between” we can surely learn to be more and more patient with ourselves too. Healing is a slow process made of ups and downs, and you have been on that road yourself.
It sucks to face times when it feels like we’re moving backwards, that eventually all of our previous efforts were vain. I can assure you that it’s not though. The fact that you are here today and you have been seeking help regularly is so very significant. Sometimes, I personally like to see my “lows” as the manifestation that something else on my “life list” needs to be checked.
With my therapist, I have learned to process and manage the way I feel according to different situations that arised over the years. But life is still full of surprises and things that are not predictable – unique situations that force us to review how we’ve been coping so far, and how to update our perspective to these new situations. That doesn’t make us a failure or moving backwards. It’s just combination of different circumstances that make us see where our attention needs to be.
What’s on your heart is so important, so essential, so vibrant. I hope you keep focusing on small steps rather than the big picture, as much as possible. Looking at the entire path ahead can be overwhelming! It’s okay to break it down to smaller, approachable steps. This will allow you to be even more in tune with how you feel on a daily basis, and notice the subtle changes that can arise over time. It’s a gift to offer yourself but to respect your levels of energy and motivation as they are fluctuating, while also not giving up on yourself either. You are good enough just as you are, regardless of how much you can commit to or accomplish everyday. <3