Hey everyone,
I’ve been going through a real difficult time as of lately and really trying to stay positive but I have so much doubt in myself and life anymore that it’s making every day tasks almost impossible. I’m even having a hard time playing drums anymore (I literally am sabotaging my playing cause I lost all my confidence) and have a show with my band next weekend. Long story short basically a girl I was dating who’m told me she loved me slept with someone else without telling me, then slept with me during an outbreak which I had no idea of, and I just found out last week I have herpes. Being sexually abused through the ages of 6-12 really fucked up my life, but it finally felt like I could have a fresh start last year (I just turned 26) and my life didn’t have to revolve around the pain I felt being abused. Now it feels like I’ll never actually be able to find a real relationship with this fucking burden disease in my life. It absolutely crushes me. My father hasn’t talked to any of his children (5 of us) in almost 5 years so relationships have always been tough for me. Life’s just hitting really hard right now and I’m also losing my health insurance since I turned 26 and haven’t even been able to go to therapy this month. I just wanted to be able to have a normal healthy relationship one day and it feels like now it’s all just going to be impossible.
