Numbing it all away was always so much easier than to sit down and face my depression and anxiety. The constant want to abuse alcohol and drugs. To not have to deal with what is going on inside of my head.
Constantly surrounding myself with people that encouraged this behavior because it benefits them in one way or another. Once the party is over though, you’re the only person left in the room for yourself.
It took me so long to figure that out. The amount of times I failed trying I never thought I would be achieving my goals the way I am today. Getting away from the substance and facing my trauma was the best thing I could of ever done. Trauma creates change you DON’T choose. Healing is about creating change you DO choose.
In the comments write heartsupportwall and I encourage you to be vulnerable and to talk about your anxieties and depression. We’re in this together. You’re not alone and can conquer these feelings. Writing Heartsupportwall you will find yourself among others going through similar experiences. Speaking about my journey has personally helped me and it can help you too