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Handling Depression - job search struggles and beyond

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone is doing well. I guess I feel very lost. I have clinical depression and generalized anxiety disorder. I have been looking for a job and its been a rough few months. There is lots of self doubt and I have had low self esteem in the past which is back with a vengeance.

Sometimes I really do feel like giving up. I know I am not smart enough to get a job. I am also not likeable so making friends is hard too. I am sorry for all the negativity. I just wanted to share my thoughts and I appreciate whoever took a few minutes to read this.

Thanks

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I believe in you. My husband has Major Depressive Disorder and while I can’t say I know exactly how you feel, I can only give you my support. You got this friend.

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Give yourself time and space to feel the feelings and go through the emotions. Go at your speed. Everyone goes along their life/journey differently. We cannot compare how someone else lives their life, there are so many factors that come into play.

When it comes to find a job, I find it helpful to make a list of the things that I want from a job…that way I can narrow things down. I am proud of you for reaching out and allowing people to help you with some words of encouragement.

You are valid.
You are worthy.
You are amazing.

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Hey @someoneweird,

Thank you so much for reaching out here. Job search while being anxious is a real struggle. I’m right there with you on this struggle bus, having a clinical depression as well and what I think isn’t generalized anxiety, but performance anxiety.

Looking after a job kind of reopens some insecurities and make us more focused on our doubts and fears. When I look at job offers, I see the requirements or the description of the job, and I think: “I’m too anxious to be able to do that”; “I can’t do that”; “I don’t have the capacity”. When I think about my previous job, I feel like a fraud. I’ve spent a couple years there constantly feeling like people saw in me skills that I never had. I don’t know if you ever heard of impostor syndrom, but it might be what you’re experiencing too.

Job search in itself is draining. But when you add a lack of self-confidence, it gets even more hard. Every step on the road gives us reminders of how we feel about ourselves, which makes the whole process feel impossible at times. Hence why it’s so important to take it easy, little by little, steps by steps. Take also the time to process how you feel while doing so. I personally keep a journal with me, and I try to write down my thoughts and emotions after I focus on job search. It helps to keep some distance with our emotions and to understand our reactions better. I’ve also been trying to write down every step I could think of from updating my resume, looking at offers, going to interviews and working to a new place. There are many little steps in between, reminders to put in place. The more you have a clear vision of what needs to be done, the more it feels possible to do it even if it’s still challenging.

We will get there, friend. You are smart enough. But building a little more self-confidence requires also to experience situations where you’ll feel uncomfortable. By giving yourself a real chance, you will give yourself the opportunity to actually see that you have what it takes to work. Confidence is built through little actions. And regarding jobs specifically, don’t forget that rejections are not a rejection of you as a person. It’s just a matter of finding the right fit, which can take some time.

Take it easy. Be gentle with yourself through this journey. We believe in you. :hrtlegolove:

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Thank you so much everyone! Your words of encouragement are a breath of fresh air. I am very grateful to be here and for this community. I wish there were more safe spaces like this site. Once again, thank you so much everyone!

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