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Hey @gena,
I’m so sorry to hear that your going through this.
You are not ugly! No one is.
I understand the pain that comes with rejection and failed/bad relationships but they DO NOT define you. I know that sometime when you’re stuck in this rut it can become hard to see a way out but you have to remember that even the longest tunnels have to end.
I understand that privacy may seem trivial where you are, have you tried/considered online therapy?
My best and only friend committed suicide not long ago and it caused me an enormous amount of pain, but I now use to fight my own thoughts. I imagine the pain I had on my family and that keeps me going. I don’t know if this may help you?..
You are not wasting anyone’s time by posting here, this is a safe place where whatever you wish to speak about can be spoken about. If something is causing self destructive thoughts or hurting you then it is worth it! You are worth it! There are ppeople who care about you even if it may just be me and people on HeartSupport. We are here for you friend.
Hold fast,
Luna x
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Listen to me: YOU ARE IMPORTANT. I don’t even know you, I don’t know how you look, and I don’t care because I care about you and your problems.
NEVER compare your issues with others’ ones; because all struggles are equally important. Everything that hurts you, matters.
I assure you that I totally understand you. I feel the same way every day of my life: I wake up every day just thinking about the moment when I’m going to sleep again, because I don’t want to face my day.
About love… just wait for it. I though the same. I’m a girl and I though that guys just used me; until 2 years ago when I started a relationship with my BEST FRIEND, and it turned out to be the best decision of my life!
I don’t know your parents, but I think that maybe if you just sit with them, alone, and start like “okay… I need to tell you something really important and I need to be listened…” you’d be listened by them. And if not, you can send me a message because I would love to know more about you and the problems you have!
Don’t cut yourself, I have done that and it’s just a motivation to get more depressed. I know it’s hard but you have to throw every object you use to cut yourself, and it would be easier that way.
Keep writting down your problems. No matter where or how. It can be here or in a diary, but keep doing it because it’s the replace of cutting yourself!
You are NOT alone!!! please remember that. I live in a small town where everybody knows you and judges you, and it’s such a fucking shit that! But you’ve to ignore them, people just like to hurt another persons. (BTW: where are you from?)
Please write to me if you need to keep talking! I find yourself amazing and interesting 
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Thank you for your support. It means a lot to me.
@LunaressRose Sorry to hear about your loss. I’ve already considered an online therapy but now I think I should really try it out.
@VictoriaJacob Thank you for your kind words. I would love to talk with you more. Please PM me if that’s a thing here (can’t figure out how to do that).
If you’re looking to try online therapy, email [email protected] because we have vetted a few online counseling sites and have found one that we trust above the others, have gone through therapy there ourselves, and highly recommend it. Go ahead and email him about it, and you can get started with it.
I’ve been through counseling and dude, it’s the best thing ever. Someone who actually cares, who actually listens, whose JOB it is to understand you and help you understand yourself better…gosh it’s incredible. Can’t recommend it more highly. Please reach out and take that step, man. It sounds like you’re dealing with a lot of internal beliefs about yourself that FEEL true but aren’t. And if you can work through those lies to discover the truth about yourself and about your worth – I know your life will change for the better, and you’ll be able to receive the love that’s ever-present in your life. You deserve it. Take that step, man! Join us in this journey 
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Hey @gena
How are you doing?
It’s been a while since I spoke to you last and I just wanted to check and see how everything is going.
Feel free to message me anytime if you just need to vent or rant. I hope your feeling better and that everything is going well.
Hold fast,
Luna x