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Having egures to selfharm and last out!

I havent self harm since august 29th 2019, I having issue fighting my impulses and fighting my shadow that huanted me and scares me. Im been trying to study DBT on my own, cant have class that are affordable sadly. I also been watching videos on it and practice the skill from it. In addition, I have also watching videos on the shadows, which gave me insight.

I have lately dealing with bad anxiety and it were I want to self harm, During my day job, I feel it be so good to cut my wrist, just release the anxiety. I have been doing cold water instead and try using cooling methons. But im afarid of relasping and going back to my old ways.

what add more to it, I have been trying talk to this girl, Im trying at least to get a friendship out of it, but I cant control my feelings. Im a hopeless romantic and get attach easy. Im get afaid of being reject, and getting hurt. I keep telling myself I meant to be alone, Im not meant for romance. I cant handle these relationship with women and they can never understand me.

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Do not doubt yourself with feeling the inability to be loved. But you must love yourself before you can love another. Practice self-compassion by being kind to yourself. Just as a good a friend or person would talk to you that’s how you should talk to yourself.
My family always told me I was incapable of being loved and didnt deserve it. It happened for so long I started to believe them.
Overtime, I have learned to silence this critic and I advise you do the same as well.
There are beautiful women inside and out that would love nothing more than an empathetic partner. Not every girl is looking for a so called “Alpha”. I can tell you from experience I have Male friends that try to act tough all the time and have very little success. A man that can support a woman by making her feel good way surpasses others…LOVE YOURSELF

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Hi friend, sounds like you’re going through a lot. I’ve been there. I used to turn to self harm to cope. So I can understand those impulses and urges when things are feeling intense.

Friend, you aren’t meant to be alone. You deserve and are worthy of love. Okay? Sounds like you just need some help and guidance to find healing and that’s okay.

I’m going to leave you some links here.

This one is one that Heart Support always keeps available in the discord to those who may struggle with self harm. It’s a small way to help distract from it: https://calmharm.co.uk/

There is also two books that may be of help. One is called Dwarf Planet which is a book and guide through depression. And the other is called ReWrite which is a book and guide through self harm. Maybe one of these could be of help to you. While I have not finished ReWrite, I did work through some of it when I had a self harm relapse until I felt more confident that I had moved past it. And I’m currently working through Dwarf Planet which has been a really healthy way to self reflect. Here’s a link that will give you access to those and other resources: https://heartsupport.com/resources/

Friend I know it can be hard to push through this sometimes. I know that things can get overwhelming and intense. But you deserve to be loved by others and to love yourself. I hope and pray that you find strength and courage and I sincerely hope you find healing.

Much love

  • Kitty