I haven’t fully coped with my dad’s death. I am working 2 jobs that are beating me down mentally. I am overweight and can’t stop eating because of my depression.
I can fully relate to this. It’s been almost three years since my mom died, and I don’t think I ever really accepted it. I still live this fantasy that she will come back.
It takes time. And eventually, on your own terms, you will cope.
Have you thought about setting meals and going for walks? Walking helps a ton with my grief.
I’m so sorry for your loss. It takes a lot of time and grace to process the loss of someone who was so close to us. I’m sure you’ve been doing your best to process those feelings and working two jobs shows how strong you are. Maybe it was even a way to keep being focused on something different when grieving was too overwhelming. But if you have the possibility right now to slow down a little - practically/financially - then I’d strongly encourage you to do so. It sounds that, right now, you really need a break and some time for yourself.
As for eating as a way to cope these days, it really makes sense. You need a relief, and food can be comforting, but it also creates this spiral of shame in the long run. It’s not your fault though. It’s only a human reaction, and I really hope that you’ll allow to be gentle with yourself in times to come. Those are special circumstances and you’ll learn to get back on your feet progressively.
Maybe talking to your doctor and see if you could get a medical leave, even for just a short time, could be something to consider. Self-care is a priority and you deserve some time to breathe, to process your emotions at your own pace. If it’s also a possibility for you and if you don’t currently see a therapist, then now might be a good time to reach out to a professional. It’s okay to ask for help when we feel overwhelmed. We all need spaces to talk, to get things off your chest and find some clarity, and a therapist can provide all of this.
In any case, you’re not alone, friend. We’re in this with you. Keep us updated, if that’s okay for you.
Sorry for you loss Fans.
I lost my father 4 years ago. There are days where it hurts more than others, even after all that time. But it got better over time. it’s cliché’d but one day at a time my friend. You can’t overcome this in a day.
I learned recently to " embrace " what I’m feeling. 'cause I realized that fighting it made it worse. I don’t know if I’m helping or not but I wish you the best.
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