HeartSupport Fan #79

I am not happy with the job that I have. I am currently going through a breakup which I am handling well but I keep asking “maybe it’s me”. I also don’t like where I live.

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Hello friend,

I know at times things feel like you are the issue. It’s important to establish that you are enough . You’re not defined by your value to any other person on the face of this Earth. So, if you find yourself thinking “I’m not good enough for him” or “I’m not good enough for her,” you’re incorrect.

As far as the job, keep working and establish yourself but look for other places and put in the work to find a place to call your own.

You are cared for and hold fast,

Zephirah / Andrea Jean

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Hello @Zephirah and thank you for taking the time to read and reach out to me. Honestly I was very, what’s the word, reluctant, to even reach out. Its been something on the back, front, and side of my mind for over a year.
I subconsciously do and have seek the confirmation of others, something I discovered and been working on recently (in the past month). I know that i don’t need it to be who I am or what i want to be. For the most part I don’t care what others think about me. At all. But then theres some switch that takes that all away. Of course its from the ones that i see and hold high, whether it be a friend or SO.

As far as the breakup, its been getting worse and worse as we “try things” of course this last argument was not good (i wont go into details) but it always resorts to me and what i did and i wasn’t sympathetic enough. I dont like to argue but i know that if i really have to i can. Whenever i have spoken up for myself i “just care about myself and i never listen or want to understand. I attack her and make her into the bad guy” When in reality i will admit im wrong about anything. I am okay with admitting im wrong when i am wrong. I just try to talk and share how im feeling with her actions but hell i dont know, maybe it is me. Maybe i should just admit i did the wrong thing and dont care enough and try harder? I know it isnt healthy and we have had times that were pure joy for me. So i guess thats where its hard for me…

As far as the job, I am in a management position and maybe thats why i dont like it. I did enjoy it at first but it seems that as my life has been continuing and the jobs i get i seem to not enjoy being there sooner and sooner. Like to the point where i dread going and rather run away. Now i wont do said thing but i do get lost in thought a lot. I do have “my own place” but hell i dont like it here either. I dont know if its a depression that has been kicking or i dont know… I dont think it helps that i am literally here alone. Which i do envy that i am alone, doing this all by myself with no help. It makes me smile, and it also scares me.

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Hey there Blackendwingz,

Glad you posted! I do not need details but I know breakups are usually very hard, so are arguments. Also, you have to care about yourself - because if you dont no one else will. As far as being sympathetic, yes try - not just for your ex but for everyone - including yourself. It sounds very toxic and at times loving people from a distance is the best choice.

As far as the management role, it is hard because you have teams of people to handle on top of customers. However, management entails a lot more details and things that you are relied on to do. It is a lot of responsibility and truth be told burning bridges is not the thing to do but finding something you are fulfilled by work wise that makes in the general money range and you do not have a management role sounds like it would be preferred.

Lastly, you are capable to do things - no matter what it is - for yourself. You are never alone, will always have a listening ear, and a family here.

<3

Zephirah / Andrea Jean

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