@heartsupport, September is what I call “season of emotions” because the temperatures are getting cooler which also means it will effect our mood. Anxiety is a constant battle I have, it has gone to a point where my mind is worrying about what others think of me, the future, spooky unnatural dreams, and that small chance of bad things happening to me. I’m not sure if I’m lonely, sad or depressed, these battles I had leaves a toll, I can’t sleep well, I overthink, I worry about things that won’t happen, and now I can’t function as well at work. The next step I want to take is be at peace and be happy like I did before, I think I need help…
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It’s so hard to feel like you can FEEL the negativity on the horizon…like you’re staring ahead in your life, and you see the downward slope, you can feel the gravity start to slowly pull you down. You start to see all of these signs in your life - the dreams, the anxiety, the lack of sleep…it feels like impending doom. It’s hard to /know/ something bad is coming and feel like you can’t affect it, or slow it, or stop it…it’s like you’re on a conveyer belt, and you can’t get off. You know you want peace, but it feels like - how do I stop what is inevitable? Which makes sense why you feel like you want help because you can’t get yourself off, but you know you need to…somebody just hit the “stop” button! Somebody just roll me off! Something…
In my life, I’ve definitely seen the power of having others help me. There are moments where I realize I WANT to be able to help myself, but I just don’t have the strength. Swallowing my pride and saying I need help, I need a mentor, I need friends, I need community, I need therapy…those are moments that almost always proceed major season of growth. Because all of a sudden, my story isn’t just about my own limits, or my own strength. I have others adding their strength and care to my life, and it changes things.
Your gut seems to be leading you in a helpful direction. Proud of you for your self-awareness and for your willingness to invite others into your journey.
If you need a starting place, HeartSupport is a great place to start. We have live streams, a Discord community, and groups where you can get to know others and start to build those kinds of supportive friendships. If you don’t know where to go to start, it’s a great starting place.
Hoping with you this September will be a season of change.
-Nate