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Belongs to: Therapist Reacts to Monsters by Shinedown
HeartSupport my monsters always survive
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I can relate to your post. People underestimate how trauma can impact people’s lives. The only way to prevent generational trauma is you. You can changed the family dynamic to become toxic to healthy. There are monsters in my life I remind self that focus on being a better person than my family.
Hang in there, my friend. Keep fighting, keep trying, for those monsters don’t define you and you absolutely deserve to have the possibility to see life through them. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s more than enough right now. I hear you though and understand how discouraging that can be at times. To be on this constant fight towards the life you desire to get. To aspire to find peace, finally. It’s like no matter what you do, those struggles just won’t leave you alone, which is freaking exhausting. It feels like running on a treadmill, giving it your all, but you’re not really getting anywhere and you yourself being stuck in movement. The monsters you’re dealing with hang around, lurk in the background, and sometimes they just come out of nowhere and knock you down. Despite the fact that you stay on your guard and try to defeat them, they keep on pressuring you and testing your limits, which feels so discouraging too.
I’m really sorry that this has been your experience friend, and really want to encourage you to keep trying, to keep asking for support, to keep using resources that could be helpful along the way. Every step that moves you forward, every time you TRY, is doing the work of healing, even if it doesn’t produce the results expected immediately. You might be making progress even if it doesn’t feel like it.
If you would like to share more, we’re here to listen. You are not alone, friend. 
-Micro, Heartsupport Staff