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Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Ohne Dich by Rammstein
I am a huge Rammstein fan and a lot of their music hits home. But your break down of this video/song brought a tear to my eye. I’ve had so much loss from suicides to alcohol induced deaths of close and dear Friends. Myself and my brother are all that’s left. While he is in Texas I’m in Michigan. I haven’t been able to bring myself to date after my divorce.7 yrs ago our daughter died and it was the end of my marriage. She remarried and I just lost all interest. I am so tired of being alone.
I can tell you I haven’t known a worse pain than being alone after knowing wonderful company. A family breaking apart is one of the worst tragedies a person can ever experience. The love in the memories that builds up over time suddenly crashes and shatters into grief. That nice, soft, warm feeling now feels sharp and jagged, stabbing at your heart and makes you choke up. Those fragments still linger, popping up when you hear a song that takes you back to a car trip, or a smell that reminds you of the holidays together, or seeing someone smile like they did. The feelings you had then are polarized into the negative now, feeling like the epitome of pain.
The grief can’t heal unless it’s felt and handled, even if they poke and stab at our hands as we try to piece it back together, and it’s painful, enough to make us cry. And that’s ok! Tears are there to ease the hurt away, help us see what we had and love it again, even when we can’t have it back. Sometimes we fall apart again, and we feel like we have to start all over again, but knowing we can put ourselves back together means we can do it again, and again, and again, no matter how long it takes. Reaching out and saying something is a great place to start healing! And I’m so glad you did! Your brother loves you very much, and although there may be physical distance, your strength in your bond brings you very close and should be cared for! You are not alone! You are strong and you are loved! Thank you for being here!
I am so glad that the video hit home for you, that’s what it’s all about. However, your connection to this unfortunately shows the incredible loss and pain you have endured. I am very sorry to hear about your multitude of losses. I can’t image the ache and pain of all of that and only having your brother left, and even he is a large distance away. I want to give you my heartfelt condolences for the loss of your daughter as well. Losing a child is one of those things no one should face. It would feel so lonely and isolated to be one of the sole survivors of so much death. And a break from this loneliness, a companion, doesn’t feel possible to you after your divorce.
I feel for you and my heart breaks for you.
There is always hope for new love, but all at your own pace. Take your time with the grieving of your daughter. One day, maybe you will be ready. I am proud of you! Be patient with your healing process. We are here for you along the way!
