Hey,
Finally decided to reach out after being too stubborn to do so because I thought this one issue was “small” or that I was “overreacting” when getting triggered.
The first issue I wanted to bring up but I didn’t was, apparently, my father has an issue with me ordering out food, and calls me spoiled. Then makes a comment that he’s going to go out and get a salad (i don’t know if he went out). After that comment, I started feeling triggered when I know I needed to eat. it was hard moments are hard because of it.
The second situation was today when I had a conversation with my mother about “my rights” as a 22-year-old. and I get told my father will be taking my mother to court because my mother out of all people won’t re-sign the guardianship papers. This pisses me off because my father is a narcissistic butthole who caused me so much emotional damage. To be honest, I’m tired of people having guardianship over me. Also with this, we had another conversation about the “part-time job” thing, my mother told me she emailed my father and even attached emails about it, so he didn’t have to fricken bother me. then i get told , “he only answers what he wants to hear/see”. Which makes me even more heated. I eventually walked back up to my room and cried for a little bit. I thought people would change. I’m def. wrong. Later that day i was sitting on my couch, and almost had an anxiety attack because I wasn’t ok.
With this whole situation , It honestly has brought me bad to how i was in 2018 , i still want to die . I were to die , my life would be so much better . I wouldnt need to suffer this pain . I want this pain to go away . I just i dont know. Im not ok. i am too weak . this has been my breaking point.
