I am too kind for my own good

Let me just start by saying the person who makes me feel this way, I have known since I was 9. I’ve saved her from smoking, alcohol, being in dangerous relationships and even from her family at times.

She would never do the same for me. She has faked most of her scenarios over and over again and I keep falling for it, over and over again. I try to do the right thing by helping. I try to be a good Christian and turn the other cheek when I get slapped but how many more times can I do it? How much more can I take? She claims she has an enlarged pituitary gland and that she has convulsions. She has these “episodes” and just admitted that she knows how long they last, she knows she breathes. The first night she stayed at my house I stayed up till 5:30 AM watching over her to make sure she didn’t have an “episode”. I slept on the air mattress ( usually I wouldn’t mind) and her son is here with her and she spends more time on her phone than with her son. I’ve been feeding her son. I’m done with this. I’m over it. I’m sorry to vent. I don’t know who else to tell. I don’t know how to break this relationship. I want to so badly but someone always drags me back. (Think of having a chain and collar around your throat and you just get yanked back) She doesn’t discipline her son who is only a few months older than mine and I think he’s on the spectrum for Autism. I’m annoyed, I’m tired, I’m pissed off and I can’t seem to hold back the flames inside me. Thanks for reading everyone and thank you for support.


Hi @Inuko

Sounds like you have found your point of enough. It sounds like a one sided relationship at this point and your love is being taken advantage of. I think this person is taking advantage of you. Remember that love does not always take, love should be given and shared. I know your heart is hurting from what you have written and the long relationship you have is making that harder.

Try stepping away from your feelings and write down a list of things that is going on. Now think if a dear friend had been taken advantage of in that way would you allow that to happen to them. You are the dear friend and you need to take care of yourself and your family first.

If she is saying she has a medical condition, she needs to get medical help and sort herself out.

You are not her nanny, nurse, or caretaker. She needs to go to the right place for help and that is not under your wing at this point. Is there anyone local you can reach out to for support? Local church or community group? If your friend is homeless and living with you perhaps reach out to a women’s shelter or housing agency to find her a place separate from yours.

Good luck and take care of yourself, you kind hearted person <3


Thank you for your kind words. She has her own home and is married but her husband is at work. I was told on the phone that her condition was much worse than it is. She exaggerates everything she goes through. She’s just here until Monday. As soon as that day comes, I’m packing her son up and taking them home. It can’t come any sooner. I would go to my church but I don’t know where to start.


That sounds like a good action plan. I know it’s going to be hard to say no in the future but I believe in you. :heartpulse:


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