8 years of laughter, love, struggles, loss, adversity, and success. All of it is seemingly slipping away, and I am powerless to it.
I think my wife is leaving me, and it is hitting me harder and harder the more I stew on what could I have done differently. Why am I not good enough anymore? Why is this not worth fighting for? Are you really throwing in the towel?
As a personality who introspectively overthinks EVERYTHING, my brain swirls with a menagerie of “what are we doing about x?” and “How are we going to handle things?” I cannot find any peace except for one of our dogs sleeping at my feet.
If divorce really is in my future (unwillingly), how do I function? How do I cope? I realize that this is probably a thing that happens here often, sadly. I just don’t know what to do.
I’m sorry, friend.
My heart breaks to see that you are having to go through this. I’ve been through a broken marriage. I’ve been through divorce. I’ve been through the process of wanting to fix it and trying and it feeling one sided. I’ve gone through the emotions of not understanding what I was doing wrong. The disbelief. I often wondered why I wasn’t good enough and our relationship wasn’t worth fighting for. I know that pain. It’s so awful
I’m so sorry that you are going through this. Is it at all possible for you to see a therapist about it? Whether by yourself or as a couple? I know that marriage counseling isn’t for everyone. I know for me it was very hard. It was uncomfortable. But is it all possible to sit down and talk it out?
Its a hard thing to go through. It’s no lie. But there is hope my friend. I felt awful in the end of my marriage, through our separation and our divorce. I had to seek out not just a life and family counselor but also a therapist and a psychiatrist to help me through it. There was even a moment that my therapist sent me to go inpatient at the hospital for a while because I just crashed down so hard.
You know, and that’s okay. If you need to seek out more professional hep to get through this, do not be afraid to. Its a hard thing to get through. Its hard knowing what to do, but you don’t have to go at it alone.
I wish I had more to give you to fix your situation. I am so sorry. It’s possible to get through. There will be days where it wont feel like it. There will be days where you wont know how to cope, but it is possible. Just surround yoruself with healthy friends that lift you up, encourage you and make you feel better. Do things that you enjoy. Whether its a hobby, going out, spending time with friends, church. ANYTHING.
I made a link here on the forums full of resources that can be used when people are hurting. There are music playlists to help calm the mind when anxious or needing help sleeping. There are meditative videos. There are all of the links to Heart Supports resources. Like their FREE books for depression and self harm. All of their stream links and more. And also some videos on mental health issues. You can find that link here
I hope that you are able to find something that brings you some resolve my friend. We are here through out your journey. Reach out whenever you need to okay? Much love to you.
Thank you for the kind words and the wisdom. Im fighting through little by little, and some days (like today) are harder than others. I hope you are well.