Hi everyone, this is my first post here, I’m mainly writing to vent.
My country has announced a state of emergency, and while people are allowed to go outside, it is not advised unless it’s necessary. I’ve been struggling with anxiety for multiple years (I’m currently in high school), and these last few months I’ve been making great progress in controlling my feelings, but after self-isolation was advised, everything’s gotten worse. I haven’t left the house in 33 days, and being away from my friends is making me extremely anxious. I’ve been having mental breakdowns, and I’m worried I won’t be able to handle this. My school moved to online classes, which isn’t all bad, since it’s still slight human contact for me, but it’s not enough to help much. I’ve been texting all my friends every day, but I just can’t cope with being away from them. On top of this, I’ve always had issues with my family, and everytime I talk with them, my anxiety spikes, and I go to my room to have another breakdown. School isn’t expected to start until the end of may, which leaves me at home for 2 more months. I just don’t think I can handle this, I’ve been considering suicide, but I know I can’t go through with it because I don’t want to hurt any of my friends. I know how much they care about me, but I’m just not strong enough to handle being alone for this long. This is the first time I’ve felt depression for a prolonged period of time, and it’s making me unable to work. I constantly feel like crying, and I can’t get out of bed until evening. I’m not even sure if i should be posting this, I don’t feel very confident in sharing this with others, there’s technically more to say, but I don’t feel very comfortable, I’m afraid of being ridiculed or taken lightly, even though I know this forum has the exact opposite purpose. I just don’t see myself getting through this, I’m worried I’ll act impulsively, I’m having to monitor my actions to not do anything I’ll regret.
Hey friend,
Everything you expressed here makes so much sense. This virus has turned life as we know it upside down and so many of us are suffering for it. Being isolated and locked away, incapable of doing the things we typically would to keep ourselves busy and happy. It’s so hard.
We all have to find ways to connect and be there for one another so we aren’t just locked away alone to our thoughts. We all need to feel like we have a place to turn to. It’s so important since things are so intense right now.
Have you joined the Heart Support discord? https://discord.gg/TzD2qx
There are a lot of people there that you can connect to and be a part of. All of which can understand and relate to the challenges that this virus has left us in. There’s a real talk channel there where you can express your heart in and there are a lot of other channels where you can be a part of and connect with other people.
It’s important to surround ourselves with friends where we can. Sometimes gaming and places like discord gives us the ability to do that. To escape from our minds a little bit and have people who can understand what we are going through.
Friend you matter. Your life matters. How you are feeling matters. I know it’s hard right now but you do not have to be alone in this. 
Stay strong. Come join us. We will get through this together
Thank you so much for posting and welcome - you are among friends here. This is a safe space.
This is real what you’re going through. No wonder you are struggling with anxiety and depression - being away from friends for so long is isolating. And we all can get up in our own heads way too much.
In addition to texting, can you skype or facetime your friends? Most countries are allowing people to go out for exercise. Can you meet a friend to walk or bike ride? Being in the house for 33 days - again, no wonder you are struggling!
Please hold on - you can make it through this. But also know this is serious what is going on with your mental health and if you can either get more contact with friends or speak online with a professional to help you through.
Nothing but the best to you - I am sorry you are going through this.