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I can't find a will to live

Since my fiance left me, every day is a struggle for me to keep myself safe. I often fantasise about suicide, having gone so far as to plan out every detail. The only thing keeping me from acting is not wanting to hurt my roommate, who’s the only person that really cares about me. But every day is agony and I don’t know how long I’ll stay strong enough.

Hey there,

First of all Im sorry that you and your fiance didnt work out. Im not sure how long he left but that is a crappy situation and Im sorry. I understand how him leaving can lead you to feeling down. However, you should never let something like a relationship ending lead to you wanting to end your life. Relationships, no matter what level, 99% of the time are going to end somehow, and they are going to continue to end until you find someone that you are truly meant to be with. Ive said many times I dont believe in the “one special someone” thing. There are billions of people in the world and you are just lucky to be with one of those people who work best with you.

Suicide is also never the answer, you may think that just your room mate is the only person that cares about you but that is not true at all. There are plenty of people here at HeartSupport that care about you and though you may doubt it, I can guarantee that there are plenty of people in your family that cares about you. Sometimes people think that suicide ends all the problems, but all that does it take your problems and puts them on to someone else, just 10 times worse because someone in their life is gone forever.

My advise to you is to continue looking for that lucky person who deserves to spend the rest of your life with you and use the negative side of what happened to make yourself a better person. And if you are ever getting to the point that you are having suicidal thoughts feel free to use the Crisis Resource channel in the HS discord at discord.gg/HeartSupport.

Hope this helps,
Yummerz

1 Like

Hey My Friend.
Thanks For Sharing Your Thoughts.
Yummerz Has A Very Valid Point.
Many In Fact.
Stick Around So You Can Find That Person Who Values And Treasures The Same Things As You Do In Life.
And They Can Find You.

Like Attracts Like.
The Law Of Attraction.

As Long As You Keep Putting Forth Your Best Efforts Into Being The Best You That You Can Imagine, Everyday That You’re Alive,
It Raises The Odds Of You Meeting That Person.

And That Person Is Probably Searching For Someone Just Like You.

“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like ‘struggle.’ To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Mr Rogers

You Are Loved My Friend.
:love_you_gesture: