I can't keep living this way

Just over a month ago I lost my sister and brother in law in a bad car accident. It has been really hard to deal with especially since everyone wants to talk about it. I’m constantly reminded about it when I don’t want to be. I just haven’t been the same since it all happened. I have relapsed with self harm after 2 years and keep wanting to do it. I just want to stop doing that but it’s so hard once you get started. What I really want is my sister back though. But that will never happen and I don’t know how to live with it.

That’s tough. You need time to grieve. I hope it gets better. Did you pick up any healthy coping mechanisms the years you weren’t self harming? Hobbies, church, journaling, or friends may need to go into overdrive, even if you don’t feel like doing anything.
Also, have you discovered any triggers? You’ll have a lot for a while but you may need to change a few things up so it isn’t hitting you in the face so often. Let me know how I can help

I have always written everything down but lately even that hasn’t helped. And right now everything is a trigger. I just don’t know what to do.

I’m sorry. It’ll be really tough for a while.
Community is the best thing. If you don’t have anyone, go find some people. Volunteering helps. Dang. I know it’s tough to find people you can connect with. That’s why I’m on here. Let me know how I can help.

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