I-deal-with-the-affects-of-emotional-abuse-neglect

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Belongs to: https://forum.heartsupport.com/t/35351
I deal with the affects of emotional abuse / neglect from my mom and have just made it through 3 years of intense counseling. I also am a caregiver to my husband so struggles with severe depression and suicidal thoughts. My gym time is my only time alone to cry and heal. :muscle:t2::heart:

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So very grateful you got a way to release these emotions AND regain a sense of control. There’s been – and still are – situations in your lie that you never asked for, positions you have been put into because of life circumstances. The wounds that abuse and neglect from parents leave on us is incredibly heavy, painful, and tied to so much grief – of what was, but even more of what should have been. My heart goes out to you and resonates with your story. I hope you make sure to keep creating spaces in your life where you can breathe, where you can be YOU unapologetically. You were pu into boxes that were decided for you before, by someone who was supposed to protect you. Today, you get to choose who you are and what your life is made of. These suicidal thoughts are a reflection of your pain, but they don’t get to decide what your future would be. You are here today. Breathing, alive, speaking out. That is so strong, brave, and such a beautiful way to stand up or the child you were. We are not meant to feel such amount of vulnerability for the rest of our lives. You will heal. You ARE healing. I believe in you. <3

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@tigg1213 sister I am always here for you and so blessed to know you!!!:pray::two_hearts:

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@heartsupport :heart:=========

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From: ManekiNeko

I can imagine the counselling would be very intense and I hope it’s helped you find some form of relief. Along with your gym time. We don’t ask to be dealt these situations in life, and we don’t do anything to deserve them, but the fact that you’ve pulled your strength to get out of that situation and the fact that you’ve been an incredible source of strength for your husband, you are such a huge light! I do hope you have some time to look after yourself and to take a breath during those harder moments. Allow that healing to show your worth and value.

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hi friend, thank you for sharing and being so strong. you are still healing and giving at the same time, that takes
a lot of energy. be aware that you are also have needs and cares. you matter to your loved ones, family and friends,
to us. take care of yourself and get yourself the time you need. you are worth it. feel hugged and stay safe :purple_heart:

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Hi there,

I just want to tell you that I find it amazing that you reached out and allowed people to know your struggles. All emotions are valid as much as the others. It’s okay to cry and feel those emotions. Don’t let them define you. You are amazing. You are valid. You are important. You are enough. You matter…so heckin’ much!

-StarFox :yellow_heart:

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From: Mamadien

Your story resonates with so many who have been through abuse and/or are caring for others who need so much support. It sounds like you have done some incredibly hard work in therapy and that is huge. It sounds like you are trying to find time for self care and that is vitally important being a caregiver. If you can find more ways and time to put self care into your day, please do. You are so worth it and it’s so important. Thank you again for sharing your story.

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From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Friend, Thank you for speaking out and posting how you are feeling. It sounds like you have so much on your plate that you have little time for you! You need to look after yourself first before you can take care of others. You are a wonderful person, kind, caring , loving but you sound exhausted. please try to take time to set aside a bit of time each day to do something for yourself even if its just to make your favorite coffee or tea or a lovely hot chocolate and just sit relax and drink it in peace. Or if thats not your thing maybe you can think of something you would prefer but that short amount of time really can make all the differene as it help to calm you, clear your mind and it gives you something to look forward to. You deserve it. I wish you well friend. Much Love Lisa x

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From: Dr Hogarth

Hi,

Thank you for sharing this with us; that’s a lot of pain for someone to carry on their own. Frankly, I think you’re amazing. You survived that abuse, conselling and now care for your husband. I mean, wow. Just incredible.

You don’t deserve to be crying alone, no one does. There are loads of support networks out there like Heart Support where you can share how you’re feeling with us, where you can at least be reminded how valued you are. Please don’t carry on bearing all this alone. You matter x

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Oh, friend. I am so glad you posted. The counseling from that sort of abuse from a parent is very tough. It’s a lot of hard work. I am so glad that you’re putting in that work and moving toward healing. Having a partner that is experiencing depression and all that comes with it is very taxing mentally. I hope that you will find more ways to take time for yourself. The gym is wonderful and exercise is a fantastic thing for your body and mind. However, you should be enjoying your time at the gym. Please consider looking for more ways to take time for you. You deserve it. Thanks again for posting. Sending lots of love your way.

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@heartsupportwall4 I’m take time for me right now with my coffee under a blanket with the house nice and quiet. You are right. I need to do this more.

@heartsupportwall4 you are so right! Self care if important but hard to do some times. My job during the day is a nurse, I’m a caregiver in the evening and weekends for my husband. I do feel burnt out and unsupported at time. I take time to connect with nature, rest and escape with music as much as I can.