So my back pain has subsided. I’m out of bed and moving about. Thank God. But recently I haven’t been able to get out of the dark parts of my thoughts. It’s like one day I’m good then the next I’m back in a dark slump thinking all the worst things.
And I’m mad. Mad that I’m so weak minded. That I feel so useless to anyone because of how I can manage to handle any hardship thrown my way. I feel like I kill the mood all the time and everyone just wants “you’ll be fine” to make me okay. And it doesn’t. And I hate it. I hate this. I’m just so freakin lost.
I don’t know if this is gonna last forever. Because if it does I don’t know if I can deal with it.