I don’t know what to do... :/

I was molested by a guy when I was high at my friends house. I thought I was in a safe place but now that that happened I can’t get him out of my head. It’s causing a strain in my relationship with my boyfriend. He understands and tries to the best of his ability to help me when I’m having flashbacks. But I feel like I’m never going to be able to make him happy because when he runs his hand over the places the guy did, I freak out.

Hey @Archie21,

I’m so, so sorry to hear what happened.

Firstly, know that it is NOT your fault. Some people put blame on themselves when they fall victim to harassment, when in reality, it’s the low-life’s fault for choosing to invade your privacy. No matter your state of mind (high, drunk, etc), it does NOT give anyone permission to take advantage of you.

Secondly, have you considered filing any restraints or lawsuits against the person who invaded your privacy? This will help keep him away from you and it’ll teach him a lesson to never do it again (to you or anyone else).

Thirdly, I would highly recommend talking to a licensed counselor about what happened, especially if you’re feeling repercussions of depression/anxiety. It’s really healthy to talk about it and to deal with it, as opposed to letting it sit around and rot.

I hope some of this helped!!


Hello @Archie21 I am so terribly sorry this happened to you.

What he did is wrong and terrible. I am seriously so terribly sorry.

A very close friend of mine that I care for dearly was raped a few years ago. I have had to learn how to speak to her touch he without her feeling uncomfortable. If your boyfriend truly loves you (which i think he does) he will take the time to respect you and love you. It will take time for him to figure out how to act and speak with you at this time.

I comply agree with @Eric with talking to a licensed counselor about this. There are trained professionals on how to help you get through this.

You are loved.