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I don’t think i can take anymore

i don’t know what to do anymore, i don’t think i can take anymore. everything is falling apart and i don’t know what to do. self harm seems like the only thing i can do to help myself. i try listening to music and writing down how i feel but it doesn’t give me the same relief. i want to see the scars but i can’t cut too deep to actually leave scars because i’m so scared of it getting infected and my parents finding out or something. and i just want to feel something. listening to music helps but sometimes it doesn’t. things were so perfect before and now it’s all falling apart. i feel like i am annoying everyone and that i’m a burden. when i try to speak to people they either ignore me and talk about themselves or help a bit. i don’t like telling people how i feel because i feel like my problems aren’t valid and people have it worse then me, and they do, so many people have it worse then me but i can’t help but feel useless, hopeless and sad. i don’t know what to do except self harm and i know it’s bad but i just can’t stop. everything has gone to shit and i can’t take anymore of it. i don’t wanna kill myself because i don’t want my family to get sad but sometimes i do think it would make everything better. i wouldn’t be around to hurt or annoy anyone and everyone would be happy. i just don’t know what to do. i’m so so far away from all my friends and i’m stuck in a house with my family, i’m always angry and sad and numb and just one slight inconvenience can ruin my mood for the day. i can’t sleep so i end up staying up till 2am every night and that doesn’t help my mood at all. i’m constantly reminded of things that have happened in the past and i can’t escape the memories sometimes. i seriously don’t think i can take anymore.

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@tatelopezhall

Hello. Nice to meet you. Welcome to the community. HeartSupport appreciates you being here. I’m sorry you are in a bad season. Have you heard of a book called Re-Write?

no i haven’t heard of it

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When i was reading your post it hit me So hard cuz i realized that is the exact same way i felt with the cuttin and family and just how i feel. And yes some times somethings don’t work for you but some times you just need another distraction besides self harm. I understand not wanting kill your self cuz you know your family will miss you, but at some point some thing will happen in your family and that will no longer be stopping you so you have to find other reason not to leave im not trying to discourage you it’s just that i went through something similar where i was relying on some one, i lost them, and i felt like it was time to finally go. But you deserve to be here you belong here and it won’t always be easy some times things will just get thrown at you, there really is nothing we can do to stop that, even tho we wish we could. Abnormal sleeping is actually normal for me too and im sorry you are feeling this way in the first place. It is also hard to forget about the past and the things that happend and having something just ruin your day and im sorry im here to talk and listen to anything you have to say cuz i wanna help you and i hope you get feel better soon

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i really am speechless, i don’t know what to say. that really means a lot that someone is here to listen to me so thank you so so much.

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Yes of course if you ever wanna talk im here i have nothing but time

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you’re so sweet omg thank you so much :two_hearts:

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i’m so fucking overwhelmed, i can’t take it anymore. i’ve recently moved to england from australia, my family and i were travelling around the uk before corona and we were doing homeschooling. we have decided to settle down somewhere and buy a house and enrol for a school seeing as we have chosen to live in england. i don’t know if i can get the work done that the school will want me to do, i’m so so scared. i’m gonna fail like i always do because i can’t get anything done or do any work for the life of me. i’m so scared to meet other people and do something wrong and embarrass myself. i’m going to be doing tests soon and i know absolutely nothing. i can’t focus on work and i give up straight away. i’m such a failure and i’m so so overwhelmed and stressed. i don’t know what to do.

@tatelopezhall

It’s a book about self-harm, how to have positive coping mechanisms, journaling, and it has information about it too. Feel free to buy it here on HeartSupport. If you are short on money, you can contact one of the HS staff, and they will send it to you for free.

Im sorry you are overwhelmed and have a test which you know nothing about. It is not your fault you can not focus you are not doing anything wrong and everyone is always scared to meet people, yes yours is different but you will not mess things up and you probably never have that is just what you think. I think the best thing you can do rn is study and if you have nothing to study with then sorry bout that but can i ask why you feel like a faillure if you haven’t even done any of the work yet i mean who knows you probably will pass

I am so sorry you are struggling @tatelopezhall - It is absolutely okay to be really overwhelmed right now. Moving, even in the BEST circumstances, is a very very stressful thing to go through. Moving to another country, adjusting your schooling, and having to adapt to an entirely different situation is no small thing. You might not ace everything, but you clearly care and your effort is recognized here.

I know you say you don’t know what to do, but I feel like you have been doing your best this whole time and that is all anyone can ask of you. You matter, I hope things go smoother than you imagine and we will be here to support you.

sorry i’m late to replying but thank you so much, it means a lot

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