So I’ve felt I don’t belong for many years now but recently I feel I can pinpoint how. I’m a good listener, but people take advantage of this. It’s like my only purpose is to be there for others, to listen to their problems (which i dont mind) but I don"t get that same curtousy back. It’s as if people don’t want to hear what i have to say. Or care about my worries. And these are those i trust most in this world. So if those few don’t care enough to listen what hope is there? I feel so alone. I don’t trust anybody due to childhood trauma and it gets exhausting doing evetything alone. Like Christopher Mcandless said; “happiness is only real when shared”.
Hey there, thank you for posting.
I know how it feels to feel like you’re always the one who is carrying other people’s emotional baggage, but nobody is there to help you in return. It institutes a feeling of loneliness and it also makes you feel objectified, like people only want to use you to help their mental health but want nothing to do with you once they feel good again.
My best advice to that would simply be to tell them how you’re feeling. Let them know that you also have things to get off your chest and need someone to be a good listener like you have for them. You might be surprised by how they respond.
And if you’re ever feeling like you need to talk, you can always post here or send me or anybody else here a message. We are here for you, we want to fight your battles alongside you. You are loved, you matter. And your struggles are not beneath anybody else’s.
There is hope.
Hang in there friend,
Jaden
Hey @cba2tired
Thank you so much for sharing this. We appreciate your vulnerability and we are so thankful that you are a part of this community.
It sounds like you are in a lot of pain because you feel like the people you’re close to, the ones that “should” be caring about you and what you’re going through don’t. I can completely understand that. I’ve been there. its hard to carry everyone else’s pain and burdens as well as trying to cope with your own. I am sorry that is something that you’re dealing with right now. It can be a lot and it can be really overwhelming.
I absolutely agree with what Jaden said. You should tell these people how you feel. I know it’s hard to trust people, but they are your friends and they care about you and love you. So often people are caught up in their own lives and they are blind to the fact that others around them, people they care about are in pain. I think that open communication is soooo important in any type or relationship, whether its a friendship or relationship or anything else. When it comes to being relational with people you have to be communicative. That’s something that I have learned and worked on over the years, myself. Its hard for me to open up and tell people how I am feeling, sometimes it is hard for me to reach out for help. But I encourage you to find the people that you can and do trust and talk to them about what you’re going through.
Its absolutely okay to not be okay, its okay to struggle, but its not okay to stay that way and isolating yourself just perpetuates that feeling of loneliness, you know?
We are always here for you. This community is a safe space and there will always be people here who are willing and wanting to listen to you and help you.
Don’t give up, friend. You are loved and cared for. Hold Fast.
Hannah Presley