I don't have any support for them

I came out to my grandma and my mom and it didn’t go so well

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Welcome to Heart Support, Gothiclesbian

Thank you for trusting the Heart Support community by sharing your experience. Coming out can be terrifying and you were very courageous to do so and share your identity. However, your grandma and your mom did not respect an important part of you, which is understandably disheartening. I wish that they can be more supportive of their grandchild/child for who they are unconditionally. It would be helpful if you have other people you trust with yourself right now, perhaps talking to them will process your feelings and know what to do next.

If you need more specific support, this link leads to the Trevor Project an organization that provides a safe space especially for LGBTQ+ people.

Here for you,


I’ve already tried Trevor Project & several dating apps and they all sucked

Hi Gothiclesbian, welcome to HeartSupport; thank you for sharing.

I am sorry that your mom and grandma haven’t taken you coming out as well as you hoped. I know how much you wanted them to be happy for you, and I can imagine how disappointed and let down you are feeling right now. Please know that HS is here for you.

This information can be a lot for some people to digest, especially close family. They will have imagined a life for you that your news has shattered; they will need time to adjust their view of your future. Give them this time, and you may find that their opinions change.

If you don’t receive the support you need from your family, ensure you are getting it elsewhere; hopefully, you have friends who can be there for you. There are also plenty of LGBTQ+ organisations that can assist you, both online and in person. In addition, your local community will likely have a support group you could attend.

Either way, what you have done is courageous and means you can finally be your true self around your family. Let them get to know the real you that have had to hide; you might find they love you even more.

I wish you the best for your future and remind you that HeartSupport is always here.


Yeah, unfortunately I’m going to have to cut ties with my grandma & mom. I was hoping that it would have been better, but I don’t think that it’s going to happen…

You could not be in their lives without cutting ties. Why not leave the door open just in case they have a change of heart?

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I’ve tried everything, I’ve been very patient with all of the horrible things that they’ve said to me…

Their extremely homophobic and their LDS.

I appreciate that strong religious beliefs make this even more complicated, but I still ask you to please leave the door open, even if it is only slightly ajar, just in case they ever have a change of heart.

I’ll try but at my own timing, but it’s going to be difficult I’m not only a lesbian, I’m also a sorceress /tarot enthusiast.

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From MyriVonGD: I’m so sorry it didn’t go well. Maybe it will just take a bit of time for them to process the info? Either way, what other people think of you, even though it’s family, doesn’t affect your worth. So hey, I know it’s rough, but don’t give up, maybe it’ll just take time, you got this💪

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