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I don't have motivation to do anything

I have no motivation to do anything. I know what you might think, I don’t want to finish an essay or go do the dishes or whatever, but when I say anything, I mean it. It takes a lot for me to get up and change my clothes, or shower, or brush my teeth or hair. It’s gotten to the point where it takes a lot from me, a lot of reasoning with myself to bring myself to get up and do the most basic things like getting water or getting food, getting out of bed to use the bathroom. It’s hard for me to do any of that. It’s just hard for me to wake up in the morning and realize what I’m going to have to do. I go weeks without brushing my teeth or changing my clothes or showering at all, which I know seems bad, but I’m perfectly ok with it.

If I realize I need to do something that I actually really need to do, like brush my teeth or shower, I put it off for days and just remind myself that in the long run, it won’t have an impact. This has been going on for months now, it’s not a new thing or something that goes in and out, it’s just constant. I’m not depressed or anything, I’m not sad. I have social anxiety but that doesn’t really impact me that much anymore because I don’t really leave my house to do anything.

There’s no reason why I feel like this. I think it’s just laziness, but it’s gotten worse. I’ve struggled with different stuff in the past that would make me think I have some sort of mental illness or something, but I honestly don’t feel sad or anxious, I don’t have mood swings, I don’t have breakdowns or fall into depression regularly. It could be laziness and this could all be nothing, but it’s not like I really have a life or anything. I don’t go to school, I don’t get up to go shopping or do any housework, I don’t have a job, there’s nothing I do in life. I know what you may think, “Get in a routine and you’ll stop being lazy!” “You just need to be more active and do things and you’ll be motivated!” Well, I’ve tried that. I’ve tried routines and being active, it doesn’t help me one bit.

I don’t really plan on going anywhere in life, so that might be part of it. I tell myself that in the long run, going to school doesn’t matter, work doesn’t matter, nothing matters, because I’m too far gone to recover that part in my life. Anyways, I’m getting carried off. But, if you could help me that would be great. I’m not asking for some cheesy life quotes or suggestions for healthy living, I just want to know what’s wrong with me.

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Dear @gracerose,

My name is Maplesead and I wanted to make something for you as a reminder that your loved and that you matter! I saw your topic on the HeartSupport wall and I felt so sorry for you. Unfortunately I can’t tell you whats wrong with you, but I wanted to say that I can relate with the part that I felt lazy and that I didn’t wanted to do anything. Also I tried to break that routine by doing other stuff, but mostly that didn’t worked for me as well. But most times that ment for me that it wasn’t something that could dive into and break actually the routine.

Let me introduce you to the villager of Animal Crossing that I drew. His name is Cousteau and he is an active, friendly and motivating character. He really loves it to motivate other people to actually break there routine and find something they can dive into. He started with this after his own story that he got depressed and started in a negative circle. People told him that he should try something to break that routine and he did, but most times didn’t worked out. Some day he found out that he really likes to sing with songs and broke actually his routine of the negative spiral. After that happend, with his kindness he is trying to motivate others who have the same struggle. He is very kind and loved, like you!

Gracerose, please remember that Cousteau is as loved and worthfull as you and he want to take care of you. Also he want to remember you that the first tries that you have done are maybe not the things that actually break that routine. Hold fast, because he know you can do it! He can’t live his wonderful life without you around her and keep you motivated that you are worth it and that you can do it. Hold fast, you matter!

Lovely greetings,
Maplesead

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From: tromboness

You are not too far gone! I’ve had similar experiences in the past. All these little acts of self-neglect will add up. It is the hardest to see the point of everything. We believe in you. Hold Fast.

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Hi GraceRose:
I think things are feeling a little overwhelming for you at the moment and it feels like everything is piling up. The first thing that is always most important is YOU. If you are concerned with your health, it may time to address it with a professional or someone you trust. Have a check in with yourself to see how you are physically and mentally feeling. Once those concerns are addressed, you can begin to take baby steps towards working on the other things. Love you, take care of you, you matter.:heart:

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Hi friend. This sounds like a very frustrating situation to be experiencing. I know you don’t want suggestions about healthy living you don’t think you’re depressed but it does sound like there is a “depression” of sorts happening. Sometimes the depression clouds our thinking and mixes up our accuracy in our perceptions. When I spend too much time by myself even without realizing how it has affected me I start feeling more and more down. I don’t necessary feel “depressed” but like you said I feel more unmotivated and just lost. If I get out and join a night class or a weekly game night I begin to see just how the isolation was affecting me. We humans need social contact. Lifestyles can get in the way of us spending time with others just as our thoughts can get in the way of feeling comfortable in social settings. I don’t think you’re lazy or unmotivated. I think you’re body is telling you it needs something.

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Video Response:

Also… I made this for you:

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@gracerose
I think it’s great that you’ve reached out to share your struggle. I can relate to a lot of the things you’ve said regarding self-care… I recently told a friend of mine, “I don’t feel depressed, but I’m experiencing depressive features.” And what I meant was, although I’m not spending my days crying in bed, I still struggle to get OUT of bed… I don’t want to shower… although I love showers! I love being in the water, yet I can’t bring myself to shower daily.
Although I don’t have all of the answers you need, I would at least like to offer a helpful tip from a friend regarding showering/bathing…

Take toys with you!! :ferry::duck:
When I was a kid, I was allowed to take a few toys into the bath tub w me… and it always really made bathing fun! As an adult, I experience the same result. Lol I know it sounds silly, but honestly having a rubber duck or two helps inspire me to shower more. I also like hot wheels and squirt guns! It truly does make the experience more fun, and takes the focus elsewhere.
Best of luck to you!
-Eyeless

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