All my life I have struggled with suicidal thoughts stemming from feeling alone in one way or another. When I hit my early 20’s I had lots of friends and a marriage that gave me great joy and fulfillment. Now at 27 my greatest fears have come true. My spouse left me and I have lost contact with almost all friends and family. The ones that I can still contact have no time for me. I have been living this way in isolation for two years. I try to meet new people but it doesn’t work. It seems like the situation is only getting worse no matter how much I reach out. All hope seems lost to me and I don’t know how much longer I can continue crying myself to sleep every night.
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Hey, thanks for sharing.
Your life sounds like a rollercoaster gone off the rails and let me just say first that I’m so sorry all these things that made your life joyful and gave you a sense of fulfillment have left. When that happens it can feel like your whole body has been torn away and you’re left with just a skeleton. I’ve never been married, but I’ve definitely had that feeling before and it goes without saying that it sucks. And after two years of feeling this way, I can only imagine how tired of it you must be. You must be so exhausted.
The good news is that none of these people have to define you. They don’t make you who you are. You are so strong, brave, and courageous regardless of how many people you have in your life. I can tell because by simply posting here it shows that you have some hope to get better, and having hope takes strength. I hope you find a home in our community, because there is no doubt that we love you so much, we hear your story and we want to help you change it into something beautiful. We want to be your friend, and for you to be ours. We want to get to know you.
This may be difficult to hear, but know that pain is crucial into building us into better people. It leaves the opportunity for healing and your situation is no different. This will build you into a better person. Healed scars can be stronger than skin.
Hang in there friend,
Jaden
Hey friend,
Thank you for sharing with us. I cannot begin to imagine the pain you must be feeling. And I want you to know that though the pain may never totally go away, it will get better. There is hope at the end of the tunnel if you don’t fall over and die within the tunnel, does that make sense? Your life has SO much value, beauty, and worth, despite how you feel about it. I don’t have a whole lot to offer but our love, our support, and our relentless anthem of DO NOT GIVE UP! You have value, you are worthy of being loved and pursued. Don’t stop reaching out and looking for friendship and, someday, love. There are people out there who want to know you, you just have to find them. Be brave and please…stay a while. 
Hold fast. Please don’t go, please don’t give up.
Sam S.
Hey @wrbjenson that pain sucks. I’ve been there. But I’ve also seen the better side that comes later. I was married once and when we split I had absolutely nothing and no one it was very hard to over come however I managed to make it through the dark until I started to see light and so far it has gotten better. So I have faith that you can make it as I have. Reaching out takes a lot of courage and a shit ton of strength so already you’ve made a huge step towards the light, I’m proud of you. I believe in you. Stay beautiful. Stay positive. The light is coming no matter how dull it seems right now. Its there.