I don't know want to do with my life

I feel so lost in life right now. I don’t have any clue what to do for a job or career. I’m always looking around for something but nothing really interests me. And the only thing my family ever says is “well once you’re making a lot of money then you’ll like it”. How do I know that just making lots of money is going to make me happy? And if I don’t make at least a decent income then all I’m ever going to hear till I die is why I’m such a failure. I hate that I just don’t know what I want. And I’m scared of spending years chasing a career I don’t actually want. The only things I ever took interest in were playing guitar and being a content creator. But those are just kids dreams right? And now I have to find a job before my parents kick me out and there’s nothing around my area besides being a cashier or working retail. Nobody wants to hire someone with no experience in anything. Sometimes it doesn’t even feel like anything is worth trying. I want to do something that will at least give me some joy but I’m so tired of not finding anything that interests me. And I just don’t know what I want. Some days I think I’m just going to be a loser and druggy for the rest of my life. I’m setting myself up for it anyways. I hate myself so much cuz I’ve done jack shit my whole life and I feel just as close to figuring out anything as I was 5 years ago. It’s really hard not to think of other ways out of this. I’ve been up for only like 3 hours looking at jobs and careers, even colleges, and I feel so drained. I just want to give up on everything

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I feel ya bud! I am 22 and have had depression, disinterest overall, hard time doing things that make me happy and difficulty choosing a career. I dropped out of one school and took a long sick leave. But now I am in graphic design school and I actually enjoy school for the first time. I also know what it’s like to feel a good-for-nothing. I think after all the hardships I am finally going to a better place mentally. You have hope too!

About the jobs, it’s difficult to find the right career right away. And many people go through multiple jobs to find (or to get in) the one they like! That thing with experience is real, why is that everyone demands experience, but no one is willing to give it to you? And then the cycle continues.

Also, you don’t need to share the same priorities as your parents. They think money comes first in job, but it really doesn’t for many. The feeling of fulfillment and a nice work buddies are important too. Why is that being successful always equates earning a sh*t ton of money? For me being succesful is having found your place and your people in this world. It’s got very little to do with how much you earn.

What kind of content would you like to do? Are you interested in editing? Playing guitar and making videos sound like they would fit well together.

You don’t need to abandon your hobbies. They can even become your job one day. But I think it’s good to start somewhere. Don’t think a cashier’s job is crappy. They are very needed. Many times when I go to store and a cashier is happy, my day is made! Make a nice resume, take it with you and ask for an interview!

But great that you came here to vent. It’s important to discuss our problems.

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I definitely understand this catch 22. Can’t get a job without experience and can’t get experience without a job. Add Covid to the mix and you’ve got a hard job market to navigate through. Unfortunately that also means if you must have a job, you must take what is available.

I must also reiterate what was stated by @porridgeprincess . Being a cashier is a respectable job because let’s be honest - any legitimate job is better than no job. Not only that, but being a cashier is a common first job for lots of people. Perhaps go for the cashier job and make videos on the side of you playing guitar. Then everyone would be at least somewhat happy. I will say though that making a living as a content creator is nowhere near as easy as it was when YouTube or Twitch first became a thing so I would also save some money once you get that job to buy some studio time for your guitar playing. It’s just so hard to become an established content creator. Not impossible of course, just very hard.

Also, I think very few people ever really know what they want to do. I was 30 years old before I got a job I enjoy with decent pay. Why? Because A) I wanted to be a filmmaker but it isn’t realistic and so that has remained a hobby. B) I initially got Culinary training because I figured everyone’s gotta eat, but that was so unfulfilling for me I got super depressed and my husband helped me go back to school.

So yea, don’t feel so bad about not knowing what you want to do as a career. You have your whole life to figure that out. Just do what you can now to get any experience to put on a job application, get you some income and save it for higher education or put it towards your passion. That would be a great start. Best of luck, friend. Where there’s a will there’s always a way.

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I’ve always wanted to make guitar videos, whether it’s covers or anything music related. I just always pushed that desire away because it’s not a priority to me. I used to play guitar all the time but people around me always said I should be using my time on something else that will get me somewhere in life. It just feels like I should be working on some kind of career and since nothing really interests me as much, I just do nothing. I honestly can’t even remember the last time I picked up my guitar let alone play it. And I don’t think being a cashier is a crappy job or anything. It’s just that’s like the only thing I’ve done and I hate it. I’ve been in retail for like 4 years and just thinking of going back to that makes me super depressed. And since that’s like my only option where I’m at, it’s hard not to be frustrated.

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How long has it been since you’ve worked retail? Can you explain your employment gap in an interview? 4 years of retail experience sounds like enough experience to enter a career. If you can’t find anything and cashiering is the last option available to you right now, just remember this: It was your first job, it may be your current job, but it will NOT be your last job. Keep looking for jobs after work, on your lunch break, when it’s slow, etc. In any case, having an income takes some of the desperation out of the job search and allows you to be a little more selective.

As for the money, I know a lot of people with a lot of money who are really unhappy. I also know a lot of people making under $40k a year who make travel and fun experiences a priority, without overextending their credit cards. Are your family members happy in jobs that make them a lot of money? Or do they tell you they’re happy while they’re buying new cars and spending $400 on dinner because they’re trying to fill a void? Just before I got interviewed for my current job, I was offered a promotion that would have paid me way more than I’m making now, but would have had me working 60+ hours a week in a sweatshop environment. I make enough to live on now, but more importantly I’m happy, doing the work I always wanted to do at a laid-back company.

Can you create content and make enough to get by? Can you work side hustles and gigs until you’re established in something? Are you willing to manage expectations and be happy with what you can afford at any moment in time? I think there’s an idea that if you’re not making big bucks right at the start of your career you’re some kind of loser, and that’s just not the case. Of course we all want to start out making good money and go up from there, but the reality for most people is starting at the bottom and working their way up. The money will come if you put in the work. In the wise words of Ace Hood, “Hustle hard; closed mouths don’t get fed on this boulevard.”

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