Last night after 6 years sober i relapsed. Im a piece of shit, but i couldnt take the stress. It was there so i just did it, took 3 percs crushed em up and snorted away, drown myself with some vodka on top of that. Why why did i do this after 6 years and cleaning myself up… no one around me wants to talk to me or listen to me everyone acts like im a second fiddle. My problems dont fucking matter. Im tired.
im really sorry to hear about your situation!
there’s no need to feel shame or regret about relapsing after being sober for a long time. in fact it’s rather common to have a relapse whilst you try to recover from addiction.
whilst you were sober, were you in touch with a doctor or specialist? if not i would suggest you find one. if there’s a helpline for those with the same situation as you in your country you should also contact it.
for your information here are some of them:
- in the UK: FRANK, 0300 123 66 00
- in the US: SAMHSA,1-800-662-HELP (4357)
we all relapse, friend. everyone has addictions of one kind or another. we all make mistakes and bad choices sometimes. and you most certainly have NOT failed EVERYONE around you! I can GUARANTEE that! i’ve done far worse than you’ve done and like a dog returning to its own vomit, often i revert to the same behaviour or speech. DON’T FEEL GUILTY OR ASHAMED. YOU ARE HUMAN LIKE US ALL, MATE x
6 years sober is alot of days, so many many days that was down to you.
1 bad day or 1 mistake does not define you.
Hang in there, reach out if you need it.