This is a long story that I’ll try and make shorter for all of us. 2019 started off with the death of my grandmother, we were so close and I’m still battling knowing that she isnt here. Not long after that my ex and I split up which is absolutely tearing me apart. It was mutual between the two of us. Which makes it so much harder because neither of us wanted it, but it’s better for the both of us like this. And lastly I have a very small friend group and every one of those people is moving away for a better opportunity. I mean I’m not mad at them, or resent them. But it still sucks beyond belief. Here I am now. I got my new apartment, starting my new job soon. I haven’t seen a single human being in 7 days, I haven’t left my apartment, I haven’t really been eating. This is just so hard. I dont know what to do anymore. Thank you to anyone who has read this.
I am so very sorry that so much has happened just in the beginning of this year for you. It sounds like a lot for anyone to handle. It sounds like there is a lot of change going on in your life and change is really really freaking hard.
I know what it’s like to lose a grandma. I was a lot younger when I lost mine, but it was very sudden and we were very close and I still feel her loss very deeply, especially at certain times in the year, or certain moments in my life. It’s very hard, and the pain won’t go away, but it will lesson, it takes time. Try Hang on to and focus on the good memories instead of the loss.
I’m sorry you and your significant other split, but it sounds like it’s healthy for the both of you. Loss like that takes time to heal, but it will eventually heal. I promise. I know break ups suck, a lot. Doesn’t matter if it’s mutual or not, it’s still super painful. Have you tried talking to any of your friend about it how you’re feeling after this breakup?
It’s so hard when loved ones move away. I know the feeling, I actually just had one of my best friends move about 1,200 miles away from me. And honestly, I hate it. But I know that in the long run this move is the best thing for him and I’m happy about that. I am genuinely happy he is where he’s supposed to me. But I’m devastated for myself, I’m selfishly sad I don’t get to hang out with him all the time anymore, you know? And I’m sure that’s a lot of what you’re feeling too. It just means you have to be more intentional about your communication with them, you know?
As far as the not leaving your apartment and barely eating goes, I would strongly encourage you to talk to someone about that. Like a professional. It’s sounds like all of this change is really taking a toll on your mental health and I think you would seriously benefit from seeing a counselor or therapist.
You’re super strong. This is so much for anyone to go through, but keep your head up. We are all here for you in this community.
I’m so sorry you’re going through all of this. I’m sorry this year hasn’t been the best for you so far. I’m sorry about your grandmother, and I’m sorry about your heartbreak. I wish I could take this pain away from you, I really do.
It can be really hard to see people you know and love leave, you wish the best for them and you want to be happy for them, but there’s still a part of you that wants them to stay. I’ve experienced that before, and it sucks. You just want things to stay the same and for everyone to just stay where they are. but try to think about all of the great things that are gonna happen with your life! you’re starting a new job (which is great, congratulations!) and maybe this job will take things off your mind and keep you busy. Maybe working will give you time to heal from your grandma’s death, breaking up with your ex, and feeling alone. I encourage you to get to know people at the place you’re starting work, maybe those people can introduce you to other people and you’ll start to feel more comfortable. Focus on yourself for a while. Work on making your apartment feel like home. Do things that make you happy or calm you down to help you. I know that’s easier said than done and you aren’t just going to wake up and feel better, but that’s not the point. The point is that you are training yourself to heal and not feel stuck in this pit.
You got this friend. We all believe in you and are so proud of you!
@Carter_Tietje I know what you mean, my grandfather passed away a year ago, as of last Thursday, and I’m in a new area, all my friends are back home, I’m having a rough time at school and at home, and there is no one to talk to. Just a month ago I was in the same place that you are. I’m telling you, it get’s better. Own the fact that you are alone right now and take advantage of it. Every day do something you weren’t able to do because of the fact that you were busy. Treat yourself, go to the mall and buy yourself a lunch at one of your favorite restaurants. Look for a hobby or take a class. To heal from the ex situation, be willing to meet others out there. With your grandmother, only time can heal that, there was a point that I was counting the days since his passing, where I was reliving the moment that I found out about him dying, and where I would cry for hours on end. Stay motivated, keep yourself distracted for now, and take it one step at a time… I wish you the best of luck!