I feel so hopeless it feels as if i’m going nowhere. I first started going bald at 15 and I was always picked on because that’s when the whole Lebron James hairline meme was popular so kids just started laughing at me and I lost all confidence I had, and became very socially awkward and shy. I used to have a lot of friends but then I felt so depressed because the problems I was having with my mom and step dad and my hair loss at 15 so I grew very isolated and never wanted to go out and I acted kind of weird around friends. As I got older my hairline was slowly receding and problems at home were getting worst. My mom is a drug addict and my step father is a alcoholic and it’s just me and my little brother in a small ass house. When my parents fight I put my brother in are room so he doesn’t have to hear the fighting and when my mom is doped up she becomes insane and when my step dad gets drunk he becomes aggressive. Anyway my mom grabbed a knife and stabbed my dad in the arm with it and that honestly traumatized me to see the blood coming out of his arm and my mom swearing at him while trying to stab him so I pulled her back and my step dad was in pain so I called the cops they came and arrested my mom for domestic violence. My mom wasn’t gone long because my step father got her out early because he said that he fell and hit his arm on the entertainment center. My mom was grateful but the problems didn’t go away. I entered high school with barely any friends and I struggled the kids I was close with acted like they didn’t know me anymore and I was failing all my classes and getting bullied at the same time from the kids who I thought I was cool with. School was getting worse for me the little friends I had started making jokes about my balding head and comparing me to this dude from breaking bad (the high school kid helping Walter out). Then I started getting comments from kids saying I looked like Trevor from GTA or Logic the rapper I was truly devastated to the point I didn’t even know what I looked like anymore because kids kept saying I looked like a whole bunch of people going bald. I was 17 and I always made jokes about my hairline but they hurt and I felt like a freak compared to all the other guys in high school and it didn’t help when my friends got girlfriends and drivers license I just felt I wasn’t living like a normal teenager should. My mom and step dad split and I was stuck with my drug addicted mother. I confessed about the bullying at school to my mom because I needed support and she was willing to help me until she took some Xanax and started drinking and she called me a pussy for not defending myself and I was hurt so I started snapping at how much of a loser she is and I regret it because I do love my mother but she pissed me off and she got even more mad and called me a mistake. Now I am 18 and my life is miserable but I still have hope, but negative thoughts just cloud my brain I say to myself 18 and never had a girlfriend, 18 and don’t know how to drive, 18 and very socially awkward, 18 and have no friends, 18 and have no future. I live for people like this on this website because everyone on here is strong and supportive just think through all the shit you have been through and you are still here so I admire all of you. I am losing hope though I really need some support because I’ve already tried to end my life.
@Dylan1 I think that it is brave of you to reach out and post this. I’m sorry that you have to deal with the situations between your mom and your step-dad. Alcoholism runs through my family and things that alcohol does to them can be a lot to handle. I want you to know that you are not a mistake you are here for a purpose and a reason. What that is, is up to you to figure out and work on but you are definitely not a mistake. It’s okay to be 18 and balding I had classmates who had that or were getting grey hairs. It’s okay to be 18 and not have a driver’s license I didn’t get mine until I was 19 and there are some states and even some countries where you can’t get it until you are 18 or older. It’s okay to be 18 and never had a girlfriend some people wait till they are older or choose to not date and that is totally okay. There is no set timeline for things happening they happen when they happen. There is life after high school and it gets better after high school. I want you to know that everyone here at Heartsupport cares about and will be there for you. I also want you to know that it is okay to talk to someone there is no shame in doing so. You deserve the world and despite your situations things can and will get better. Keep hanging in there.
Thank you I really appreciate you for taking time out of your day to read this. It really means a lot and you just made my day.
I’m sorry that you’re going through this. I do want to include that my boyfriend is 28, and he is losing his hair, and has some hair loss in the front, as well. I still love him nonetheless. He just likes to wear a hat. I hope things look up for you. Everyone has things they wish were different about themselves.