I feel i had fail

It devastating that I only 3 mouth left that a year clean from abusing myself. It only took one argument and second for it all to come crashing down. I post myself punching myself in face on social media. I told my friend I wanted to die and hurt them all. My family relationship has been not best, I down a lot of problems on my family and I can’t professional help. I want to be a different person, not perfect one. Just to ge normal, and not be destructive. I have dark today at work of killing people. People that hurt me and I hate myself so much, I don’t any god or power can save me. I can’t have relationship with a woman or have healthy friends. Everyone know that’s I’m a mental case and I can’t help it anymore. I think cutting my wrist instead of punching, I figure less harmful and or maybe use drinking to ease my pain. I try DBT therapy on my own and don’t think the coping skill are working anymore. I feel I’m out of options.

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Hey @Metalskater1990 I see you have posted a few threads kind of like this. Is there any way for you to help us help you? I would love to support you better, but I am having trouble with the different threads making sure I am being supportive and listening to your story best. How can we help? Thank you for reaching out, I hope that we can find something to support you.

Thank you man

Well I try keep it simple, I been doing DBT on my own and could not find class for me. It still struggle impulse to lash abusely, feel the urge to cut when I’m stress or upset. And dump my problems on people.

I do coping skill like temptress, smell, walk and exercise. I was doing actually kinda good. The pandemic put in dark place. I don’t have money to be on my own and I been burden to my parents.

  1. How not overall share on social media and not make people worry.

  2. Should I go on meds, they did not work for me at first and I try for a years.

  3. Is if possible to change, without access to DBT or CBT class

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Thank you for following up. It sounds like the current global situation has limited your access to the care you are used to, I am sorry about that! Just so we are clear, posting here on the wall is not “dumping” your problems on anyone. We are glad you are here.

I am not an expert, or someone who can help you with everything you need, but it is really good to know where you are at and sometimes the hardest thing about all this is recognizing the steps you need to take to get better. I highly suggest looking up programs available in your part of the world that might be able to provide services remotely? Maybe something like that would help you get through this tough spot and be ready to pick back up with in-person medical attention when that is available for you again.

Another thing I may be able to speak on is posting on social media. I think needing validation is part of the reason for doing that for some people. You might find you can still feel heard by posting that you are struggling, or that you would like words of encouragement, instead of posting things that cause people to be worried about you (if you are concerned about that). As long as you are safe and don’t need someone to take action to protect you, it might be nice to just open it up to love and encouragement instead of posting things like self harm. Just a thought, may not be right for you, that is for you to decide.

I hope this helps, hang in there my friend.

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