So I know this is my depression and I’ll feel better eventually, but if feeling real down about myself right now. I just went to go see the Joker movie with some of my coworkers and it made me feel really depressed and bad about myself. I tend to be socially awkward and feel like I don’t really fit in ever, and the movie highlighted a thought about myself. In the movie you see his heart and how he has a huge heart, but due to life and his mental illness he still becomes one of the most famous villains of all times. I know where my heart is. I know that God sees my heart, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t still become the joker. I already struggle to provide for my wife and never feel like I’m good enough for the standards I set of myself or the people around me. I have two degrees that are 99% done, but always find a way to self sabotage or let myself get jaded about the career field and change careers. The underlining thing is I never seem to fit in.
You shouldn’t feel obligated to fit in. Normal people are weird. You be you and that’s what you’re supposed to do. Just because you saw the Joker movie and it reminded you of yourself does not mean you’re gonna turn into a crazy killer clown.