@Heartsupportwall in the past 11 months, my wife & I have had 2 miscarriages. We’re still ‘trying’ but no luck so far. I have not fully processed my feelings about all this and find myself constantly angry, confused, or simply on the verge of tears. I would like to see a therapist (I have in the past) but who the f has money for that? Some days I feel like I’m holding onto my sanity by a thread. Working out & listening to music ( like @augustburnsred ) helps but man it’s hard.
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My goodness, I am so sorry. I do not know what it’s like to be in that situation, but all I can say is this: keep trying. I know that’s probably the last thing you want to hear, but I do know a friend who had 5 miscarriages before a successful birth came along. Don’t rule it out yet! Also if nothing else, may I suggest adoption? I know a lot of kids out there are looking for good parents & families.
As far as therapy goes, HeartSupport has actually partnered with better help to provide affordable therapy for people who are really going through it! Here’s this link: https://www.betterhelp.com/heartsupport
Hope that helps friend! Hold fast!
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There might not be anything more painful than losing a child. My wife and I lost twins last year due to an ectopic pregnancy… my brother also lost his ‘functionality’ after we lost our father to suicide. His body was physically grieving, and stopped producing testosterone… it’s so incredibly hard. I want you to know that you’re not alone. The tears still come, and the confusion still lingers, but there is always hope. If you can’t afford a therapist, maybe try talking with someone you trust, or connect with an online community of people who have similar experiences, hell, DM me and we can talk… things do get better, and we can heal from even the heaviest losses. I’m here for you brother, and I’ll help you carry the weight.
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Oh my goodness that is so hard and so frustrating. It totally makes sense to have those angry, confused, and sad feelings. To keep hoping to have a baby, to have your wife be pregnant, and then only to have a miscarriage. What a rollercoaster. I know that Heartsupport has a 7 day trail with Better Help for therapy, maybe if you want therapy you could look into that. I am so glad that working out and listening to music helps. I think thay kinda of thing has helped me is just some self care, some gentleness with my husband and myself, and grace. What you and your wife have been through is so hard and rarely talked about. Thank you for posting. Please remember to take care of each other, take time, be kind and patient with each other, keep reaching out, and don’t give up hope. Have you two talked with an OBGYN? They might have some ideas too.
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@kryptobates Hey friend. I am so sorry that you and your wife are going through this. My heart goes out to you so much. On one hand you are trying to process the losses you’ve endured, to grief at your own pace. On the other end, you keep trying but feel like facing this wall over and over. It makes sense to feel on the verge of tears - and those are not unhealthy. These are painful experiences and how you react is absolutely valid. Your heart craves for a positive sign and just one good news for once. You have been so brave already and I truly commend you for still doing things that are good for you in the midst of these circumstances. I hope with all my heart that your wife and you rely on each other as much as possible. Know that you are not alone either. We are here. We see you. We’re willing to support you through it all. Your wife and you are in my thoughts and prayers. <3