I feel like im slowly losing my mind

i dont know what to do anymore im slowly losing my mind i have mental breakdowns everydays, i always feel suicidal, anxiety, depressed it never goes away. im tired
i need help but i know i’ll never get it, i know i shouldn’t be by myself but i want to be alone, im alone studying a foreign country but i’ve had nothing but bad experiences sincce ive been here and i can’t say i want to go home because of the time and money my parents have put in, i have no one to lean on, i always do things i regret, im tired it feels like there’s always a noose around my neck its suffocating i just wanna die but i dont want to. Why me just why

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Hi Bread,
Welcome to Heart Support, and thank you so much for reaching out to us.
you are not alone in this, we are here for you. you are so strong for posting and sharing with us.
feeling tired and out of energy i can relate to a lot. feeling depressed, anxiety and lonely.
i often feel like something is dragging me down, weight on my shoulders that is putting me down.
be sure that we are here for you. a place for you where you can vent.
what make you feel regretting something ? what are those things ?
have you considered a therapy for yourself or maybe a self help group ?
it helps a lot. also sharing here. keep us updated. stay strong my friend.
what helped me a lot was also writing everything down whats on your mind, also the good things. try to
do things that you love, that makes you feel good. take care of yourself. it is hard and takes energy but it
also will make you feel better afterwards.
i can tell that you will do better, take small steps towards that. that matters most. you are worth it and you
matter my friend. you are loved, feel hugged and
Greetings

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From: Who.is

Hey bread, welcome! Love the name because who doesn’t love bread!
do you have a close relationship with your family? I know what it’s like to try to hide away your feelings and be scared that the people close to you won’t understand or will not respond kindly. My hope is that your family will want to love and support you and even if it’s a matter of money, you are infinitely more valuable than money.
Alternately there’s online therapy which some of them offer free trials or cheap discounts for people who may be financially struggling like Better Help or ReGain.it could be worth looking into so that these thoughts and feelings don’t drown you out completely. It’s not fair for you to be in that place. Hope to hear from you soon.

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From: ᏒᎧᏕᎥᏋ

Hi Bread, welcome to Heart Support and I love your name. Thank you for posting. I’m sorry you’re suffering so much mentally and having a bad experience. I think if my son was in your position, it would kill me to find out he was suffering. My son’s mental health is way more important than money and I hope your parents feel the same way. Have you talked to them at all about how you’re doing? What would happen if you asked to come home? Does the school you go to have any resources to help you? Take care ~Mystrose

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From: Lisalovesfeathers

Welcome to HeartSupport Friend, Thank you for posting, Firstly I want to tell you that you are no longer alone, you now have a whole community that is here to listen, love, support and encourage you. We are not therapists however if you wish to open up more you can, we are always here to listen, what is making you break down each day, why are you so unhappy? Would it be too much to be able to turn to your parents and explain to them how unhappy you are? No parent wants to see their child feel like this. If you cannot get any therapy and you wish to use us to open up to then please do so and also please remember, your life is valuable, you are loved and worthy of happiness. Much Love Lisa. x

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From: listening2day

Please feel comfortable reaching out in this community. For me, internalizing all the “mess” we have to deal with is sometimes a larger burden than sharing with someone/anyone. Sometimes just expressing it to another will help one sort through it. I do understand also not knowing or realizing of such a person/thing. And also, give yourself a break, even just moments. Just some fresh air.

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Hey Bread,

I am so sorry that you are going through this right now, especially when you are far from home. I can’t be easy. I am glad you found us.

You say you need help, but know you’ll never get it. Why is that? Do you feel that the resources aren’t available to you? Or that you can’t utilize what is available for some reason? Are you parents aware that you are struggling to any degree? I understand it may be hard to bring that up to them, or to the degree that you may want to reveal.

I encourage you to look for any resources around you, even if it’s just someone to talk to. Online resources are out there too, if you feel like you are in a bad place mentally/emotionally. We are here as well, to talk and encourage. Any of those options are better than not talking to anyone about this, friend.

You matter, and you have absolute worth. Please, let us know how you are doing as time goes on. We’d love to hear from ya again.

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From: twixremix

hi bread,

welcome to the forum, my friend. thank you for your vulnerability with your mental health and how isolated you feel in this foreign country. if it’s okay to ask, why do you feel like you’ll never get the help you need? i know how hard it is to live with suicidal thoughts, anxiety, and depression so i hope one day you do reach out to the resources (therapists, counselors, doctors, support system) you need to get the support you deserve.

while you may physically feel alone in your current environment, i know that your parents wouldn’t want you to feel this way despite the investment they’ve made - most parents would want their child to be alive and happy over any dollar amount. it doesn’t have to mean you have to drop out or anything, just being honest with them will take so much weight off your shoulders if they’re the people you want to open up to. at least for me, just saying everything i’m feeling to someone out loud makes things a bit better and they’ll help you find the resources you need.

your life has value. you are loved and far from alone, especially in this heartsupport community that understands what you’re feeling. you can and will get through this. you can do this, i believe in you.

love,
twix

From: eloquentpetrichor

Welcome to HeartSupport, Bread, and thank you for sharing your story with us. I’m sorry that you feel like you cannot tell your parents how you are feeling. Do you think that they wouldn’t understand or are you more afraid of hurting them by telling them? I know that sometimes the situation can be difficult when discussing mental health with people or depending on what country you are in but for your own well-being it would be really great if you could find someone in your life to talk to about these things.

Even if you tell your parents it doesn’t mean you would have to go home. Maybe taking a semester off from school to go home and work/recharge would be a possibility or staying in the country you are in and doing the same. You wouldn’t even have to explain everything if you don’t feel comfortable doing so. Maybe just say you are a bit burnt out if you think that would be an okay way to word it. I hope you find some way to get some help. And know that at the very least we are always here whenever you need friendly people to talk to about this stuff.

And on the subject of feeling burnt out. If you think that may be part of it we have a Focus Group on our Discord server that is for people dealing with burnout if you think that might help you and you want to look into it. Good luck with your studies and with your mental health. You matter. Hold fast :hrtlegolove:

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