i’m aromantic and most days i’m fine with that, but there are some days where i feel like i’m just so unlovable because of it. all my friends around me are having crushes, are in relationships and so on and forth and i feel like i’m just… wrong. like there’s something wrong with me for not being able to love romantically. and the fact my parents don’t really understand it, hurts even more.
and i feel so silly for this, but i just saw a video of two characters i adore. and i started crying, because i’ll never be able to have what they have. i’ll never be able to love someone in a romantic way. i’m even crying somewhat writing all of this.
i just had a conversation with someone, who is also aromantic, today about it all. it felt nice having someone who could genuinely relate to what i feel, or rather don’t feel.
I feel like a mess. and i know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being aromantic or whatever, but i can’t help these feelings sometimes
From: I Am Reclaimer
Hey friend, It’s interesting that you mention that you got emotional when watching the anime. I say this because the reaction you had, paired with talking with someone who is also aromantic is kind of the start of how romantic relationships go. Just because you’re aromantic doesn’t mean it’s impossible to love someone. Maybe you could seek professional help with regard to this as things like this are tied to some deeper tendencies that we(you) may not be aware of. Otherwise, keep having these conversations with this other individual as I’m sure you’ll find speaking to someone of like mind might open you up to some emotions you haven’t really explored before. I have faith that you’ll be able to learn about love and it’s nuances once you start to open yourself up more to this.
I can relate to that. I had a crush on a girl in my middle school class. Her name is Tiffany. I liked her but had no clue whether or not she had similar feelings, but I doubt she did. Even so, I knew that even if we did have a relationship, it wouldn’t be able to go any farther than being friends. I have no desire for intimate relationships. I imagine what the future could be, but it would fall apart. I know this might not be the best thing, but I gave up trying to have an intimate relationship once high school began. It is better this way, for me at least.
I can’t say that I can understand what you are going through but I can tell you that from my experience (someone who is hyper-romantic) that it definitely isn’t all roses and cupcakes. I struggle constantly with relationships and it breaks me down regularly. I can’t imagine what you are going through but the grass is not usually greener on the other side.
From: Dark Weeb 666 (Matt)
Hi HeresA.Gun.KillMePlease. There is nothing “wrong” with you ok. Its just the way you are. You are not unlovable. There are always people who will love us the way we are we just need to find them. I hope you will find that person. I understand you might feel incomplete but we are all different and we all have our challanges. Its something that is unique to all of us. You are great the way you are and there is nothing wrong with you ok
You are so not unlovable. I promise you. I’m personally on the opposite side of that spectrum: asexual and panromantic, AND in a relationship for now 11yrs! At first, I didn’t know that about myself. It has taken time and I have felt so many times as if I was incomplete, unlovable, broken, unable to give to my partner what he could have with most people! I felt like I was wasting his time. But you know what? He’s still here. Because as cheesy as it sounds, when two people share life together or have a relationship, no matter how, they get to define together how this relationship functions, and how they are going to overcome the challenges that appear on their journey. You are not unlovable for being aware of who you are and how you are attracted or not to people. The way you love is yours, and being aromantic does not mean that you can’t find your significant other or have a fulfilling love life. You get to define it, to explore, to discover yourself more. Being YOU, being true to yourself, being authentic, being honest, will never be a fault. It may not follow the same pattern as most people around, but that is okay. This life is yours. This journey is yours. There is no need to compare what can’t be compared. You follow your path, friend. I’m proud of you. You are loved unconditionally. <3
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