I feel unwanted and unattractive

Hello Guys, it has been a while since I have logged in, I hope you guys are having a great new year.

I’m not sure what is weather this is the third-lockdown in the UK, but I am a 20 year old, who is gay and It was hard enough trying to come to terms and finding myself, when I knew that I was 14 years old that I was curious and it has been a 5 years process trying to find myself with years of hiding it or trying to change myself feeling like it was wrong or it wasn’t me. and depending on the person I have been slowly coming out and accepting myself for who I am.

But the dating scene is really hard, because I can see my closest friend with his boyfriend and while i’m not a jealous or spiteful person, i do feel like i am missing out seeing how cute they are together and how close they are. where as I want something like that and i have been trying very hard to meet someone in a pandemic world. and it either goes nice at first and i meet someone and we start talking and when they seem to turn from a nice boy, i’m getting to know to rude and arrogant with me or simply get messages like “not for me”, “not interested” and when I hate my size and the way I look, it really hurts when just wanting to meet a nice boy to spend some time together with.

I’m not really sure how i feel about this or if emotions are just hitting the fan with not being able to go to work, go see friends or live life like normal and I think this may be causing me to be hurt more, but I am starting to feel depressed from this and had a few nights crying because i’ve felt that worthless or unattractive that in 20 years i’ve never had any sort of relationship. Thank you for reading this, i felt like i had to just type and empty my head abit.




Loneliness is a bitch, and I wish you were not experiencing it. Opportunities to meet others during a lockdown can’t be very few. As far as I can tell, even the “beautiful people,” when in an ideal situation still have great difficulty finding a meaningful relationship. You might get lucky, and meet someone in a relatively short period of time, or you may be like the rest of us, and need to go through several failed attempts, before you meet someone that fulfills you.

You must accept the reality, that you are not worthless. Feeling that you are, makes you bad company for yourself. It’s also an unfortunate self-deception. If there is an attractiveness scale from 1 to 10, and you are three, genuine self-acceptance will boost that number to at least seven.

Being self-conscious, drains energy, and tends to make those around you feel uncomfortable. Therefore, take inventory of all of your good qualities, your integrity, and your loving compassionate heart. Realize, that you are indeed a blessing that’s waiting to be discovered.

Being lonely is really hard, but to find a friend in yourself, and be comfortable with your own company, will enable you to have a much more rewarding relationship with another. That’s because you’ll be together because you enjoy each other’s company, rather than just having a need to be with someone.

I pray that this lonely time will pass for you.

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I don’t think your’e unwanted and unattractive, you probably just haven’t met the right person yet. It is up to them to decide whether they want you or not and attractiveness is a matter of opinion.
You probably will meet the right person someday.

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