I had enough of living

I don’t belong in this world. Even my own family doesn’t understand my very bad depression. They tell me to reach out if I need anything. I reach out to them and they say don’t be depressed. It’s not that simple. I would love to commit suicide to make my pain go away. I hate life I really do.

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hey @Nothingnear
Yess you do belong in this world . They may not understand but they do care . Maybe those are the words they shouldnt use but your still loved.
Please dont commit suicide its not worth it . Please continue to reach out we love you and we see you.
-Ashley

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I am going through the same thing for the last year.
Please respond to me as I don’t know what to do.
I feel terrible daily and have thoughts of suicide.
They get so bad I feel like I might do it.

It would be nice if I could talk to someone going through the same thing.

Please talk to me.
My name is Robert

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That’s what my family does too. They sound like they care about you if they don’t want you to be depressed and their loving care is enough that if you are considerate that it should keep you living. Remember the past has a music of your heart even if an ickieness covered it. This music could be strong if you reconnect dreams and make the connections of life, and it could overcome your ickiness that coats and sucks out joy. I am feeling the same as you with depression and my family just do the same thing. If your music gets stronger, there’s still no way to make your family understand, but that music reperesents your whole past and your personality and if you hear the music, even though no one else had the ability to hear it, you could keep living as the you that you always were, and be loved by your family.

Hey @Nothingnear,

Thank you so much for being here and taking the time to share your experience.

Depression is so misunderstood… People often assume that it’s only a matter of sadness and personal motivation while it’s so much more complex. I’m truly sorry to hear that it creates this wall between you and your loved ones. But you are not at fault here. You never asked to struggle. You just want to feel understood and feel less alone in your pain.

I felt myself this isolating feeling from time to time. It’s exhausting to feel like you have to explain again and again how it feels, also that there is no magic recipe. Healing takes time, patience, love and perseverance. Which can be draining for everyone and bring its share of misunderstandings, unfortunately.

Maybe the people around you don’t really understand what’s going on for you. Maybe they want the best for you but are uncomfortable with this specific topic. As it sounds that your family is willing to help, it’s possible that they just don’t know how to do so. The intention is here, it just needs another way to be expressed than something similar as “get over it”, as it’s not that simple. I know it’s disappointing to face that kind of comment. Though I want to believe that maybe this might be a matter of communication. On your end, maybe it could help to actally tell them what are your needs and what you expect from them? Maybe trying to write down how you feel and share it with them could be a better way to communicate, at least in the beginning? Just because it can be difficult, even for us, to describe how we feel sometimes.

In any case, know that you are not alone. Really. There are a lot of people in this communitywho understand depression from a personal standpoint - even though the experience itself is always unique. We see your strength here and we see your heart. Your struggles are not ignored. Please keep reaching out. Keep overcoming the fear of being judged, misunderstood or rejected. You’ll always be welcomed with love here. You are among friends.

Sending love your way. :hrtlegolove:

N.B.: @Clingon69 You are seen, friend. I’d like to encourage you to create a topic here on the Support Wall and share your experience - or just vent -, if you’re comfortable with it. What you’re going through is important and your voice matter. If things get worse, please reach out to a crisis line as well - you are not alone:

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Hey @Nothingnear and @Clingon69, sending you both my thoughts and care. I know when I have been super suicidal, a particular support group was very helpful. They don’t encourage suicide but its a space specifically for people who are suicidal. Helped me feel less alone. I don’t know if I’m allowed to share it here (moderators remove if needed) but it’s called Suicide Forum.
All my love

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