I hate having anxiety

this is kind of silly, but… well.

i found someone who sells two anime figurines for a pretty cheap price and i want them so badly, but the thought of messaging the seller paralyses me with anxiety.

and i don’t think many people here know, but english isn’t my first language. i really, really struggle to articulate myself in my native language sometimes, so that makes it even harder for me.

i think what upsets me the most right now is that my anxiety really hasn’t gotten better at all, over the years. i’m constantly being reminded of that lately and it frustrates me. i wish i could go back to therapy, but it’s not really possible right now. and i feel like this is something so trivial i shouldn’t even be anxious about. ugh, i genuinely despise having anxiety so much


Hi there,

Thank you for sharing this. That does sound incredibly frustrating and I’d imagine that it could also impact self-esteem.

It’s understandable that further anxiety is triggered by speaking in a language you aren’t as comfortable with, and I know that speaking with others is also a common source of worry. This sounds like it turned into such a tough situation.

I hope you end up being able to buy those figurines and that you’re able to access therapy again in the future. Nothing in your post is “silly” or “small”. Anxiety is a lot to go through, and I’m wishing you all the best. Please stay in contact; we’re here for you.
<3 Tuna

1 Like

Hi Friend,
i can feel your post.
this is so tough, it is so hard when anxiety hits. i often can’t even make a shitty phone call, or go into a shop just
to look at stuff. to go to an event because of people, because of something. it gets easier, but will it ever go away ?
i don’t know. but i can relate to you.
i hope you get some figurines, i hope that one day you are a step further into your journey to take these steps for
you. you deserve that. and you did great so far. you are loved and you matter most :purple_heart:
feel hugged


From Microsmos: Nothing silly in your message at all. Really. Anxiety/social anxiety can be SO frustrating and reduce so much of our freedom in our daily life. I’m right there with you on this constant battle, and completely understand how it seems trivial but is actually a big deal. This is about how safe you feel, and there is nothing stupid in that. Yes, people without anxiety would do this kind of action without even having to think about it, but ultimately we all walk on different journeys, and what matters when you think about yours is where you are now, and less how things should be if you were not anxious. I hope you know and will gently remind yourself that there is no shame in what you’re experiencing right now. The amount of opportunities that I personally lost because of my anxiety would probably be of the size of a dictionary book. You may not control these reactions for now, but you can still be a friend to yourself during those times, and give yourself grace. Anxiety is a b*tch. It freaking sucks.

Would it help eventually to write down on a piece of paper everything you need to say? (with keywords, for example), and to take some time to practice on your own at first? English is also not my native language, and before I had the opportunity to actually practice almost every day thanks to work, I was VERY anxious about it and for people to eventually hear my real accent… Truth is, I was more uncomfortable hearing myself speaking that way. But as I started to have meetings of all kinds in english, I got slowly used to it. Eventually, practicing to speak out loud and say the things you would need to say on the phone could help you experience the discomfort of hearing yourself at first, little by little.

You ARE brave and courageous. No matter what you decide, living with anxiety and wanting it to not rule your life anymore is huge. I’m proud of you for not letting it win, for your willingness to try. This whole conversation may be virtual, but rest assured that we are in this with you. You’re not alone. You are loved, no matter what. :heart:


Hi, thanks for getting in touch with Heart Support. It’s a great first step.

Your anxiety is never trivial or silly. Stress has many triggers, and the trigger doesn’t always determine the scale of the pressure felt. Something that you consider trivial may trigger deep routed anxiety built up over many years, for example, your struggle to articulate yourself in a different language. I can understand why knowing that you have to put yourself in that position would be paralyzing - I would be more surprised if it weren’t!

I understand your frustration that your anxiety is getting no better - it can be a struggle. But, keep chipping away at it. You never know; today could be the day you make that first big breakthrough.

Get your figurines even if you have to do it anonymously online! Creating strategies to live with your anxiety is part of the process. Why force yourself to do something you know will trigger you? Instead, work towards doing something like this in person one day - when you finally do, imagine how amazing it will feel.