I have trouble finding friends and relationships

I feel like I’m not attractive enough for someone plus nobody likes to go have fun like I do. Every time I go to concerts, I have fun watching bands yes but deep inside I’m depressed because I see couples having fun together and I tell myself “why can’t I be like them why???” I’ve been trying to find love for almost 3 years now but it’s so hard to find that person. I’m not sounding depressed or anything but I feel like I’m not good enough or look attractive to people. I don’t know what to do.
Friends wise I’ve tried really hard to have friends because I have only a few but I don’t have a best friend and don’t have true friends. I do so much for them but they don’t have a heart to listen to me. When I’m depressed or going through stuff, I have nobody at all. I feel worthless.

Hey.
It is easy to look at the world and see all that you don’t have. I do it all the time.
There isn’t any easy way to find someone who is your person. Sometimes they don’t show when you want them to. It sucks, but that is when you gotta see past the hype of having a partner. Im working at it, it sucks and its heartbreaking at times but it doesn’t imply you are worthless. You have worth in yourself friend. You are good enough, you are lovable. The right person will find you attractive! IM so sorry you feel this way though, I hope you can hold on and believe that you are WORTHY!

As for friends, they are sometimes even harder to find… Sometimes you take more, sometimes you give more. I would try to reach out and talk to one of them. Let them know how you feel? Perhaps they want to help you. And if not, then this community is here to remind you that you are full of worth!!

Hugs
Pale

Hey friend. I’m sorry that you’re having trouble. Finding love isn’t something that can be rushed. You have to give it some time. I know you feel like you won’t ever find anyone but you will in time. I’m sorry you don’t feel you can reach out to your friends about your feelings but you can always come to support wall. You’re not alone feeling like this. None of my friends have the same interests as me for the most part either. You’ll find someone. Stay strong.

Kayla

Hey Metalrock,

Thank you so much for sharing your story man. It takes courage to admit to others that you are in a bad place, and that is extremely admirable and inspiring.

The biggest thing to remember in these situations is that you ARE worthy of the things that you are struggling with. Don’t let that monkey on your back whispering that negativity in your ear ever deter you from being proactive about finding someone. Unfortunately, finding friends and significant others is something that needs to come with time and effort, which is sounds like you are putting in. If your “friends” don’t give you that in return, then they aren’t worth your valuable time and effort, and consider putting that effort into more worthy exploits. Just remember that this community is always here for you as an outlet, and that you are loved and appreciated by all of us. Hold fast brother. <3

Matt

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Friend,

I want you to know you are not alone in this.

I have also had a very very hard time finding a significant other relationship and also keeping friends. I did not find any true friends until the end of my high school career, and when I joined this community.

The thing I really really want you to remember is that your worth does NOT depend on another person.

I know it is really hard to find people who you connect with and who you can get close to. Just know you are not alone.

If you are looking to further friendships in this community I highly recommend you to join the Heart Support Discord. If you would like to just let me know.

Please know that your worth IS NOT dependent on another being.

Hold fast

With love,
Lyss ( your old pal Blurryface)

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Metalrock7,

First off thank you for posting I am glad you felt like you could share with us. I want to tell you a truth. You do have someone you have us here at heartsupport. I also want to tell you that the lie of you feel worthless is totally a lie you are not worthless you are not at all that. I will say that attraction and what not is on the eye of the other person it is not what is on the outside but what is on the inside. My entire life I have struggled with body image and dating and friends because I always felt so different I still do. I will say that for me I learned to not seek the love but to let it find me. Perhaps learning that you are worth the love could help you. I know for me I have come to find so many who love me so unconditionally that I am now sure that I will never ever be alone. Many people here remind me daily that yes maybe stuff in my life isnt the best or what but I have someone around the corner who will hear me (it is a computer corner but still). My best friend came from this community and is still apart of it and we are moving in with each other soon. Perhaps you should come join the discord if you need a link let me know. They also have a heartsupport live stream that is 4 days a week and wonderful place to meet people. Just know you are not alone and you are not worthless.

Hold fast,
Ash

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Metalrock7,

Thanks for posting, I have struggled with this all my life and things are getting better. When you say you feel like you are not attractive enough you are already negatively predicting about yourself, also I had a long talk about this with someone yesterday and it opened my eyes, but that is also a form of self centered you are thinking about how others view you. Let all that go be you, start talking to people and they will like you. Just give it time.

-Evan

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Thank you so much everyone! I really do appreciate it! I’ll try really hard but I’ve tried for too long and it just makes me more depressed like yesterday I was kinda worse and I had nobody to talk to. If you do want to talk about you’re going through also then let’s talk this together and help each other overcome our depression.
Hugs,
Nick

Hey dude!

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and choosing to be vulnerable with us - it means a lot! If you’re religious, I would highly recommend getting involved in a local, healthy church. I’ve always found that volunteering is the easiest and quickest way to make friends (and perhaps meeting that special someone). Alternatively, try dating apps! You’re bound to meet someone awesome. The 2 apps that I’ve found the most success on (via meeting high-quality people) are “Coffee Meets Bagel” and “CrossPaths.” In the meantime, please know that you are NOT worthless. You have SO much to live for and a bright future ahead of you. It’s there, even if you can’t see it yet. I promise you. Hold fast - you got this!

-Eric