I honestly dont know anymore

my entire life summed up quite easily is messed up. I cant cope and I just dont know what to do. its been this way since before october 2018. i have bipolar, autism, ADHD, OCD and PTSD and they kick hard. my black dog is huge and it wants me gone. im not suicidal at the moment but it comes and goes. i suffer a lot lately. i have no one to talk to or be with other than my mom and she have never been depressed in her entire life. my dad is the reason i have PTSD so him i dont talk about. i just suffer more than i feel is fair. im 19 years old and i already feel 90. its so much stress, so many tears. i dont even know why im writing this i just need to tell someone. the ER have stopped taking me in because “i dont cut deep enough” to “need” them. the way i see it, its a cry for help. im trying to scream as loudly as i can for help but i feel like im shouting at a brick wall. im sorry if this seem overly depressing or anything.

I’m sorry things are feeling so rough now. It definitely sounds like a lot going on at the moment but thank you for sharing your story. We’re here as a community to support each other so we’re here for you.


Hey Friend,

Thank you so very much for reaching out here. It is hard to talk with people about mental illness when they haven’t experienced it themselves, but there is an entire community here that loves you and can relate on one point or another with you. You most definitely aren’t alone. I also want you to know, that although the ER says you don’t cut “deep enough” to need help, your pain is real. Your feelings are valid even when those around you don’t understand. Keep fighting, I know you can do this.

Hold Fast,
Hannah Rhodes