I just dont know.....and it scares me

Been going through a tough time lately. Im really struggling with axxiety, being down and suicidal thoughts.
I’ve quite 3 jobs since March because I’d get so anxious wile at work it was starting to effect my other health. Both jobs i left before my last one i left with the expectation of finding something better for myself. Then i left this one because i just felt bottomed out.
Now I’m have this overwhelming question in my head, i dont know if I’m gunna be okay. I dont want to make plans for the future because i cant even picture my future. Im just scared all the time. Im just feeling lost, like i dont k ow who i am and what i have to offer the world anymore.

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Thank you so much for coming here and posting, also welcome to the community. Feeling anxious about work while at work isn’t ideal, and especially if it’s impacting your physical and emotional and mental health - that can really burn you out even faster than just having a stressful job on its own. Do you have any health benefits? If so I would definitely suggest talking to a mental health professional about how you’re feeling. Remember that you matter, and just take things one day at a time. If you can’t take it one day, take it one hour at a time, or one minute or one moment at a time… until you can take another step forward… You truly matter, your presence in this world makes a difference in ways you cannot even imagine. What you’re feeling is valid and hurts, and I can feel that through your words, just remember that you DO matter and it is NEVER too late to get help. I’ll post some resources for you, in case you need them:

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Hi, welcome! Thanks for coming here for support <3 First off, to address your last point, you don’t have to offer anything to the world in order to deserve to live here and be here. You deserve love and kindness and life.
Second, I would really encourage you to contact a mental health professional regarding your anxiety. It sounds like you’re rating pretty high on the emotional pain scale (I like to use this one: Pain Scale with Descriptions) and a mental health professional could be able to help you manage your anxiety to levels that impact your daily life less.
While you’re in this space, though, it’s okay to not make plans for the future. It’s okay to take life one day at a time and just make it through to the next day. You can do it <3

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Hey @RClark4693,

Thank you so much for sharing all of this.

Anxiety, suicidal thoughts, moving from different jobs… not mentioning covid/quarantine and the overwhelming effects of the state of our world these days. That’s a lot, indeed. Friend, how you feel makes sense. And it’s absolutely justified to be scared and wonder how things are going to be for you in the future. Those are some heavy things to deal with at the same time. It is objectively overwhelming. But you are not alone in this, okay? I’m really glad you’re here and decided to reach out. So you can be reminded some fundamental truths:

  • It’s okay to feel how you feel.
  • You will be okay.
  • We’re in this together.

Really. Those are not empty words. We see you. And you have so much to offer to this world. Also to experience in this life. Circumstances are just difficult right now and it’s weighing on your shoulders. Which is, again, absolutely understandable.

When I feel like things are really piling up and I’m overwhelmed by life itself, I feel the need to really slow down and focus on just taking babysteps. It’s not always easy, because I also have this urge to do so many things at once and multitask. But it’s okay to slow down and take it easy. As @MommaFoxFire said: one moment at a time. That’s a precious advice. Get rid of the unecessary responsabilities, pressure or tasks. Focus on what is essential to you right now in your life. Your very first priorities, including yourself. With anxiety, we can feel like there are SO many things to handle. But when we look at it, objectively, we can realize that we’re also overwhelming ourselves with so many unecessary burdens. Whether it’s thoughts, things we added on our to-do list or worries of all kinds.

What do you enjoy? Do you have any hobby? Taking some time everyday just for yourself could be needed. Be selfish. Don’t be afraid to be selfish. It’s your right, entirely. Your well-being, your health, your comfort are never a luxury. It’s a necessity. :heart:

With anxiety, something that could be helpful is also to chose a moment during the day when you agree to let your anxiety just exist as it is. You can take 15 minutes at a scheduled moment, grab a piece of paper and a pen, and just let it out. Write down all the things that are stressing you. Memories, circumstances, projections about your future, imagined scenarios. Anything that could be running or spiral in your mind without really being aware of it. But the thing is, at the end of the 15 minutes, it’s over for the day. You give a space and a moment for your anxiety to exist, but you also push those thoughts aside during the rest of the day if you identify the same anxious thoughts coming to your mind. You compartmentalize, so you can learn to approach this anxiety in a different way. You won’t be able to change it all at once, or even make your anxiety disappear. But you can definitely learn to live with those thoughts and see it as they are: only thoughts, nothing harmful in itself, even when it brings some very deep feelings. :heart:

You’ll be okay. Sendings love your way. :heart:

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Thank you for the support and your kind words. I :hugs:

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Thank you for the support and kind words. I appreciate it and will be seeing my doctor monday morning

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