I was so happy today… but now I feel so low… my grandma came in and told me “ Be careful what you you say when you talk behind my back” I don’t remember saying anything bad about her… when I tried to talk to her she just yelled at me “ I’m not talking! I’m exhausted!” Why do I always have to ruin things? She told me to just go back in my room without giving me any explanation. I feel like I should leave…
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That sounds so brutal, that_pigeon. I’m so sorry your day was ruined. It’s possible that your grandma’s reaction has nothing to do with you at all. She may have overreacted to something completely harmless or misheard/misunderstood something. It could have been someone else who was talking about her. She did say she was exhausted.
Definitely giving her space is a good idea for now. If it’s safe and you feel like you want to go out to give even more space, that could help too. Maybe just leave a note saying where you are going and when you’ll return?
I don’t think it was you that ruined this though. At any rate, I can relate to that kind of turn out of nowhere from a family member. Such a let down. Give yourself some grace. Sending some love your way.
Take care,
Satty
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Hi that_pigeon,
I am really sorry about what happened. It’s seems to me that your grandma may have falsely accused you of talking behind her back. Even though you were reasonable and levelheaded to clarify and make sense of the situation, it seems like your grandma refused to listen and acknowledge your position. I can’t imagine how you feel experiencing a really happy day only to see someone you love bring your peaceful day crashing down. Being yelled at alone makes anyone really sad. It makes you think that you did something wrong or are not good enough to receive a more peaceful warning. But to experience this knowing that you did not deserve this makes this even worse, which is further magnified by the fact that a person you loved did this.
YOU Didn’t RUIN IT. YOU DIDN"T DO ANYTHING WRONG. WHAT YOU RECEIVED WAS UNJUST. BUT YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO FEEL THIS WAY, AND WE AT HEART SUPPORT LOVE YOU AND WANT TO SUPPORT YOU.
I would consider talking to your grandma a couple days or week later. And ask her what she meant. It could just be possible that she was so exhausted that it affected her mood. Maybe she was sleep deprived. Obviously, I don’t excuse her for her actions, but there may be more to it than we realize.
Hope this helps!
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