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Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Hate Myself by NF
I keep listening to this video in search of hope. I understand what NF means by suicide being the only relief from the pain. I’m sitting here contemplating hanging myself, don’t have an immediate plan…but the thoughts are present. I hate myself as well, and have zero friends in which I don’t blame anyone that has walked out…I would too if I could. Simply at a point where I’m just counting down the days til I pass from this place. I’m 40 and hope has never felt like a strong presence in my life. Don’t know why God keeps me here, I serve no purpose in the world and it’s not like I even exist. Sometimes I wonder if I’m like Bruce Willis in the Sixth Sense.
I’m truly sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way. It takes so much courage to express such deep pain. I want you to know that your feelings are valid. You are not alone in this struggle and it’s okay to reach out for help. I’m here for you and HeartSupport is here for you!
Your life does have purpose, even if it feels invisible right now. The world can be incredibly heavy. It’s hard to see the light when you’re in such a dark place. Please, remember that your worth isn’t defined by how you feel or the circumstances you’re facing. You matter!
Listening for hope can be tough, but sometimes it can be found in the smallest thing such as a song, a memory, or a moment of kindness. Please, hold on to that glimmer, however faint it may seem. You deserve support, compassion, and love.
Be gentle with yourself and know that there are people within this amazing online community who care about you and want to help. Keep going
Hey, thank you so much for opening up and telling us about what you’re going through. My heart goes out to you and I am so sorry that you feel so hopeless and unseen. What NF says holds real weight. Sometimes the world around us feels so dark and destitute that we can only rationalize death as an escape. The possibility of a hopeful ending fades and it almost begins to feel like there is solid rationale in death. If we weren’t here, we wouldn’t have to struggle.
Though death ends our capacity for struggle, it forever ends any hope of life getting better. If death prevails, hope can never even have the chance to shine through. If death prevails, no one ever gets to know the incredible, unique person that you are and that only you can be. If death prevails, you don’t get to impact the world in the way that only you can. If death prevails, your arc of redemption never gets the opportunity to start. And that arc is there for you. There is hope for your life. You were not put on this earth solely to suffer. Your book does not end here. You were created for a purpose beyond what you will ever be able to fully comprehend, and the impact that you have on every single person in your life is irreplaceable. Though the darkness feels all-consuming, and the pain feels utterly destructive, you cannot be broken by it. You are more than your struggles. You are not defined by your hurt.
You are loved so deeply. We are here if you want to talk more. We would love to speak with you more and help you through these struggles. Your life matters too much to let it fade away in silence. Please reach out again when you are in the middle of your hurt. Holdfast- we believe in you.
I’m truly sorry you feel this way, I know feeling despair and loneliness like this is a truly horrible place and I want you to know that you are not alone and your pain matters.
You have a light inside you that isn’t defined by your past, your choices or whether anyone else sees it. It exists simply because you exist and you have a purpose in this life even if you aren’t able to see it yet and I know it’s hard to see that when everything feels so dark.
I’m proud of you for having the courage to reach out to us, you matter. You deserve the space to space to feel, to have low days, and you also deserve to see hope in the small things around you, you deserve to hold onto that and to keep going. I’ve been in that place where it’s too dark to see a way forward but in taking those small steps eventually things got lighter. Please hold onto that.
