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Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Alice in Chains Nutshell
I know how he feels sometimes. I’m not addicted to drugs but I deal with depression a lot. So much loss in my life over the last several years, all of my family is dead, including my sister’s murder back in 2020, and she was killed by her son. I used to have my cat for support but now she’s dead too. I feel so alone and lonely sometimes. I live alone and I’m ok with that most days. I’ve been looking for a therapist but haven’t found one yet and I really need one. I don’t have suicidal thoughts or anything like that. I’ll never take my own life but I need help processing all of this shit. I try and be strong every day and most days I’m successful, but sometimes it just hits me like an anvil dropped from the top of a building. I was fine until I started watching this video. I love Alice in Chains and I love and miss Layne Staley and this song breaks my heart because I know I’ve felt those same feelings before, of just feeling lost, surrounded by friends and family but not talking to them because I didn’t want to burden them
Hello! To kick things off, you are not a burden! There’s a whole community of people here who volunteer to help offer words of encouragement for people who need it. We WANT to be here, to help YOU!
I’m so sorry for all of your loss the past several years. Especially such a tragic situation with your sister and nephew! What a “heavy” thing to happen to a family…I can’t even imagine!
I completely understand about the anvil analogy! I feel the same way with my mental health ups and downs. We all have stuff we’re trying to work through, and some days are better than others. Some “seasons of life” are better than others. So that’s why I volunteer with HeartSupport, because I’m having a pretty solid season of life right now and I want to help those who are struggling. I hope not, but I certainly may need to turn around and ask for help myself…and that’s OK. The great thing is that you have shown courage and ownership of so much with this post.
To your point, I think a therapist could really help you unpack and process. It’s a real bummer that you haven’t been able to find one yet. I assume you’ve checked with your health insurance, if applicable? I know mine at least, has added multiple mental health resources very recently (like over the past 1-2 years), whereas the policies had no mention of it just a short time ago.
Welcome to HeartSupport friend - I am so glad you found us and took the time to comment on the Alice In Chains reaction video. What a song, right? It hits home for so many people for so many different reasons. I personally love the song since the bass guitar is so present and clear in the song (which I play bass, so I am a bit biased )
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your family members, some in very tragic ways, and also your cat. I cannot imagine losing that support network and having the feelings of loneliness you described. I just watched this reaction video this morning when I was washing the dishes and you can just hear the anguish and torment in his voice…he is not singing about some character in a movie or book - this is his life and his tragedy, and the world lost a huge talent (and from what I understand) a kind soul to heroin addiction way too early.
Thank you for sharing about your depression, I want to assure you that you are not alone, and that sometimes it does feel that way, or that nobody would understand why you are depressed or would think less of you if they knew what you were feeling/thinking. I have had those exact same thoughts and feelings as well - and they are all lies. Everyone gets down, everyone gets lonely, everyone struggles at some point - and anyone that tells you different or that life is all rainbows and unicorns is either on drugs or lying. Social media is the worst for this - everyone shows you what they want to show you (all the shiny happy people) and nobody wants to deal with the down and dirty of life…the lows, the depression, the anxiety, the stress, the “bad” stuff.
Well, we don’t subscribe to that BS here at HeartSupport - we all know what you are going through, we love you regardless, we want you to know you have unsurpassable worth, and we love to reply and to help support and encourage you to be strong, keep going, find a daily dose of something that does make you smile or give thanks, and hopefully find a way to be kind to another human being and make that positive connection continue. Be well, keep rocking, and know that when you are lost, there is always hope and a way forward. Reach out to us anytime!
Hey friend, I’m so sorry to hear about everything you’ve been through, you’ve clearly endured so much pain and loss. The fact that you’re able to vocalize your emotions so well and reach out for help is amazing and shows how strong you are as a person. Grief is so complex, and its weight can be overwhelming, especially so when those closest to you are gone. Having a support system that helps you navigate these emotions in a safe space is paramount to your healing friend, and I’m glad you trust us enough to be part of that support system. Finding a therapist can take time, and I wish I had advice for you on how to secure one, but in the meantime, connecting here on heart support or other communities is a good bridge. Please know you are not alone in your struggles. Music is powerful, it can bring up emotions that are tough to navigate, it’s ok to feel these emotions friend, please give yourself the space to process them, and be kind to yourself. If you ever need to talk again, don’t hesitate, heart support will always be here!
@HeartSupport@Gregor1an, thank you so much for your kind words. I know almost everyone deals with depression or mental health issues of one form or another from time to time. I think it’s part of being human and nobody’s life is perfect. I know I need help dealing with all of the stuff I’ve been through, losing so many loved ones and I was also homeless for over a year which started in 2021, but I also love helping others. It’s something I’ve done my whole life. Even when I was homeless I still helped other homeless people when I could. My cat is gone but I still feed 6 to 8 feral cats here by my apartment every day. I want to start a foundation to help the homeless but I don’t have the money or resources to do so right now. I know I’ll find the help I need it’s just a matter of time. And I’m also looking into getting another cat because losing her has affected me a lot more than I thought it would. Thanks again for reaching out, I really appreciate it
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