I was too afraid to start a new job with Amazon. It’s not a good place but I was too scared to try. I’m just a DoorDash driver but I don’t want to be doing that forever. I had an interview on Friday for a job I’d be better suited for. I think I did ok but I’ve put myself in such a bad place. That job would be better for me but I think I’m too uneducated to make the most of it. I hope I get a call this week. I always do terrible at interviews. I don’t know how to sell myself to others. I’m so behind on bills that I don’t know how to get out of this mess I’m in. My friends can’t really help me. I don’t want them to know how bad things really are. I really want to give up but I don’t want to be homeless. I can’t pay rent next week and my electric bill is through the roof with how hot it’s been. Too many bills that I just can’t pay. Why am I a failure?
You aren’t a failure. Only those who give up or don’t try are failures, and even then, they have the potential to stop failing. We fail at things we attempt, but that’s not being a failure, because each time it happens, we learn something, or it becomes a necessary step toward succeeding.
Regarding the jobs, facing change is scary. That might be part of the reason you don’t feel that you do well with interviews. There are classes that help people with the interview process, resumes, etc. Also, keyword “interview skills” in Youtube, and you’ll find a ton of videos, mostly done by professionals.
Most communities have system where you can dial 211, and they can help people get the help they need in an emergency.
Please check back in and let us know how you’re doing. It’s clear that you’re motivated and willing to do what you can to succeed. I’m pretty sure someone will see your potential and hire you.
Hi there @Starspirit
I can say for sure that you’re not a failure - one, you made a very brave post, and posted it! That shows you’re brave.
Your a doordash driver - again, that’s a skill and a talent that not everyone can do.
Interview skills are like any other skill - there is some degree of natural talent, the rest of it is hard work and Practice!
Wings has the perfect idea. Maybe get your friends together, and run through some of the videos together, so that you can all have some fun while getting more familiar and comfortable with interviewing questions!
you’re not a failure, friend. You’re out there, you’re trying. Hope things go well and you get the call.
You are far from a failure. You were scared of taking an interview and look at you! You did it! I know so many people including myself who are terrified of interviews or think they do poorly with them. I used to roll play with my friends. It’s a practised skill, it really is! It’s not always easy to sell yourself or to get the right mix of humble brag as I call it haha.
I’m a slow learner, that’s my weakness, but I still always ask questions if I don’t understand. I will always try to find a solution and a way of understanding.
You probably are the same. You say you’re uneducated, but you’re not! You might learn differently from those around you. You might take some time to find the solution.
Start this sort of positive self talk to yourself, because you are so brave and worthy.
Driving?! I hate it! I’d get lost and then cry and be too scared to approach the door.
From this post I have already seen what values you bring to a team and I hope that you embrace them too!
As far as paying bills ect, my heart goes out to you. It’s so hard and I wish the world could be more lenient to each other. Do you have the opportunity to request extensions? Where I live I have been very very lucky with the opportunities for help with finances. I am not sure what it’s like for you, so I often can’t give great advice about it I’m so sorry, but I do hope you find some encouragement here.
Hi Friend, I am so sorry that you are in this situation but you are not by any stretch of the imagination a failiure. You are not “just” a door dash driver either. You work hard and you are trying to work harder, energy bills have risen beyond anything we have ever seen and everthing else has also gone up ridiculously. People are struggling that have never had to struggle and you friend are struggling and there is nothing about that, that makes you a failiure. I dont know where you are, I am in the UK there are places you can get help, food banks emergency grants from the government. But as i dont know what is available to you, you would need to look it up where you live, but please look, there are things available.
in the meantime we are here to support you emotionaly. You Matter friend. x
Thanks for responding. My Dr is getting me hooked up with a social worker so it might help. I’ve made progress since my mom passed but things are still fucked up.
The uncertainty that comes after an interview is the worst. Did I completely bomb it or did they consider me. I had an interview last week on Friday and I haven’t heard back. Is it ok to reach out and ask for an update?
Thanks for responding. I really don’t have any friends anymore. The price I pay for suffering through depression for so long. Not that I’m old but I just don’t think have much to offer anymore. My confidence has been in an abyss for so long that I don’t know how to get back to normal.
I think at this point in my life I don’t have much to offer. Every time I try I screw things up. I don’t like feeling like this but it’s like hearing a broken record in my mind. I wish I could figure out how to be happy without asking for help.
If I haven’t heard for a few days I usually reach out! There no harm. It shows that you are interested, and sometimes they appreciate that.
The waiting is so hard! Sorry it’s been a few days since you last responded here too!
Hope you’re doing okay
I’m back. I’m doing much better now but it’s still a long road. I didn’t take care of myself for many years and I’m now starting to take steps to move forward.
great to see you @Starspirit!!
we’re here for you in your journey! Glad you’re doing much better now. 
You’re loved!
That is so good to hear @Starspirit. Thank you for sharing some life updates here. Self-neglect is a big struggle of mine – I feel you. It takes plenty of steps to move forward and defeat the discomfort/weirdness that is tied to self-care. You’ve identified something major that was lacking in your life. You have a direction to follow, one that can only lead to more love, patience and grace given to yourself, through any life obstacle you may encounter.
You got this. We believe in you. 
Glad to hear that you’re starting to feel better. Hoping to see that continue in the long run. I’m hoping that you figured out your financial status then? If that’s still an ongoing issue, and you are doing Doordash still, some of my friends recommended transcribing jobs as well.
Wishing you well. Take care.
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