I’m scared about going back on Instagram

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I have been getting stressed a lately about going back on instagram. I know that my friend did not respond when my aunt has pass away. It break to see no response, it put into a dark places, where I get dark revenge fansty. I keep pushing away of going back on.

I’m not have radical appectance the situation, that she never be there for me.

I wish I can just tell she the reason why I might commit suicide, that she reason why I hate myself more. That everything we had was a lie. I want to hurt emotionally so bad to point where she broken or gave her be pissed.

However, I know it won’t take away to pain away. It won’t bring her back. The silly thing I still love her regardless, sometime I hate her, but I still love her. In other words, I love the memories we had. I will always love even when she does not love me.

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