I need help

Hi everyone,

I need help with motivation/accountability relating to my physical health. I do well with my diet for a couple weeks and then I’ll give up. Ill try again and do well for another couple of weeks and then give up again. I don’t have the discipline I had in my 20s to stay fit. Although in my 20s my Cerebral Palsy symptoms weren’t as invasive and I didn’t have a special needs daughter.

In the past weeks I feel my depression is returning, but I’m trying to keep pushing through for my own good but I can feel myself failing. I really don’t want to do anything anymore except sleep.

I know exercise is good for clearing your head but I just lack motivation of any kind. I don’t know what to do at this point.


I think doing well on a diet for a couple of weeks at a time is a very good thing. Might it help to deliberately schedule a guilt free day to relax the diet and indulge in something you especially like, then go for another couple of weeks before indulging in another guilt free day to relax?

My approach has been that if I’m going to eat something I shouldn’t, I turn the guilt switch off and savor it to the greatest extent possible. In other words, if I’m going off the wagon for a time, I’ll make damn sure I fully enjoy it, making the “transgression” worth it.

Over time though, my diet has been extremely consistent, and it really never occurs to me to go “off the wagon.” It’s not as though I deprive myself. For one thing, once my intake became a long-established habit, my body didn’t crave additional calories. For another thing, I do have small desserts most evenings.

Most of the time, on days when I don’t feel like exercising, I tell myself, “well, maybe I’ll do just a little bit of exercise.” Like a lot of things, the hardest part of getting started is in taking the first step. Usually, once I’ve gotten started, I feel as though I can complete my usual routine. Still, there have been times when I’ve exercised way less than usual and I felt okay with that. After all, some exercise is better than none.

Most of the time with me, motivation comes after taking the first step.

Finally, if depressive symptoms are overwhelming you, let your doctor know about it.

Thanks for being here!

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I will have to try this. It would at least help with not feeling so bad if I slip for a day.

I’m doing better than I thought I would on the stationary bike after having not done it for a while but I’ve got a monster migraine right now going on my 2nd day.

Thanks, Wings, I always look forward to your responses.

@Sapphire Reaching out for help is a huge step toward regaining your health. It’s a sure sign that while your body is saying I can’t right now, your spirit, your brain is saying I really still want to. That’s big. I found that when going through my journey to getting healthy again, I had to really shift my mindset. I had to look at the whole thing as one kind of meandering journey for me. I couldn’t maintain that “perfect eating plan” for more than a few days. What I learned about me was that totally depriving myself of things I enjoyed because “they were bad” was sure to fail. I let myself plan some treats into my eating. I also learned how to see those days I “fell off” the plan as just days. Not failure. Not being bad. And I would go back to what was on my plan.

I think giving yourself grace when you need it can be so healthy for us. When we take the time to love ourselves, we care for ourselves better. Does that make sense? Sapphire, you have so much going on and finding the way to make you more of a priority in your own life is tough. But you are so very very worth it. I find you to be an amazing and inspirational person here in our community. You truly are an overcomer even when you don’t feel or see it.