(TRIGGER WARNING) Yes, the title is correct; you read it right. It has been near 7 months since my last post. My mindset about life and how I now deal with things have changed and improved significantly. After a lot of time, perhaps too much time, I have accepted that depression is purely a negative mindset. After seeing a recent huge study that indicated that depression isn’t caused by an “imbalance of chemicals”, it sent me into a spiral of deep thought. These deep thoughts have showed me that depression is inheritably just laziness. No offense to anyone who has it, but it’s true. And I’m not saying that having these thoughts don’t make it harder to have motivation; I have empathy for you, but it shows that depression is a lack of genuinely trying to improve things in your life, whether it’s intentional or unknowingly done. I wondered why I was depressed for so long. I got no exercise, no sunlight, I played games all of the time, I had no faith in my creator, no talents or genuine hobbies, I listened to sad music all of the time, and I played victim. But once 2021 rolled around, I began my journey by simply telling my family I wanted to work out, so my step-dad took me. The momentum started, and it never stopped from there. By that summer, I started going for walks and playing piano more, and I felt a happiness, an actual feeling of calmness for once in around 4 years. It felt so surreal. Now in 2023, I don’t feel miserable, yet sad. Sure, I am not happy, but I can’t say I am sad about anything either. I workout and actually have lots of muscle. I open my curtains every morning to let the sunlight in, and I meditate listening to calm sounds with sunlight hitting my skin. I have a talent in piano and writing and now have plans in the future, so I can actually look forward to a good future. I read a lot more, especially about philosophy and other religious things. Talking about religion, I found faith in my creator and began to pray every day and night, knowing that even in my lowest depths of despair, someone still loves me and gives me the chance to help me out, forgiving me for every misstep I fumble. All that as well as the fact that I go to parks often to appreciate the God-given beauty of the world. From the animals running around, to the birds chirping, and the beauty of the lakes flowing. It’s all so beautiful to see. I go on walks daily and I have made new friends, even a girlfriend. One with the same faith as me and virtually the same values. She is such a beauty and is exactly what I wanted in someone. I now have an entirely new source of fulfillment. I can now take care of someone and look forward to talking and pleasing someone. I stopped listening to purely sad music and switched it to oldies and calm love songs. I don’t drink, smoke, or cuss, and I am very forgiving and don’t hold resentment towards anybody which makes life just more stress free. I reduced my screen time significantly and now live more in the real world instead of virtual. I go to bed earlier and have a more consistent sleep schedule. I got over recent losses of friends and loved ones and accepted the fact that it happened, and has taught me very valuable lessons for the future. All of this has helped with my mental state, and shows that right when I take care of myself physically and genuinely solve the problems in my life, it all goes away.
If you are reading this and are mad that I either got happier, or am saying that depression is merely just a mindset, I understand, and I do not blame you, but you must realize that what I am saying is true. Go for a walk right now. Look around you and appreciate your real life and what you still have that other may not have, and be thankful. Go after your problems. Get off your phone. Go for a run. Meditate. Do something; it all starts with you. I love you, God loves you, we all love you and I promise you can get through it. I hope everyone is doing well, I pray for you all.
Hi daltonm,
thank you for sharing. thank you.
why should someone be mad at you for getting better ? for living your life ?
your post is awesome, to hear that is amazing ! you deserve that. and i feel so happy for you.
to call it “just a mindset” i would probably not agree on completely. everything is starting in your mind. when you have
years and years lived, and you have those ways of thinking inside yourself, it is hard to get out of that. when you see
the negative things more then the beauty, it is hard to see the beauty out there. but what you say is right.
it all has to change with you. with me. change takes time. change takes energy.
to change your thinking habits, to change your activities takes energy and time. work on yourself takes time.
when you do not want to change, you will not overcome depression. and all of that starts with little things in life.
when you go outside, you start noticing these little things that we all should be grateful for. nature, air, animals, sun. .
we learn what is good for us, and what is dragging us down, helding us down.
the mind is a cup, where everything we do, get in together and is one in the end. positive and negative feelings.
this cup can run over, for some more sooner some later. life is overwhelming, life can be and ever will be overwhelming.
what is a big problem is that we often do not concentrate on ourselves more. we all should do that.
envy and greed is having such a bad influence on people. be grateful for what you have, not what you don’t have.
there is a lot of thruth in your words, self-awareness is something that we all need more. you do amazing and
you deserve all of that. you are loved too, you matter most 
feel hugged