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I really need advice

I woke up at 5:23 a.m. due to a dream that I wish to know more about. I’m not a dream expert so I need some advice.

Dream:

I felt so scared. All these feelings, I couldn’t calm down and everything felt like they were spiraling. That nothing was going to get better. My mom was sitting on the couch and I on a chair. My ex-SIL was sitting on the other chair watching TikToks with earbuds in. Suddenly, my mom sat up and had a knife. She came at me with the knife intending to stab me. She kept screaming at me and screaming and screaming but I can’t make out what the words are. I dodge her attacks and run to the kitchen, grabbing a spoon that was on the counter. My mom enters the kitchen and attacks me again but this time I stab her and run off. My brother was in his room playing video games with his headphones on, talking to his friend. No one could here me. No one could help me. We both entered into the living room and as she went to attack me again, I stabbed her again. This time, she slipped, stabbing A (my ex-SIL), then fell on the couch. I yelled out to A for help but she just ran to my room and beckoned me over. I stabbed my mom a couple more times and then smothered her with a pillow. I ran to my room and locked it, holding my finger on the lock in case she tried picking it. My mom was surprisingly alive and started to bang on the door, threatening me. I cried as I called out for A, but she was no where to be seen. I had my phone in a pocket and I took it out with one hand. Then I asked Siri to call 911 twice but all she did was give me information about restaurants then say: “I added the number 1 to your reminders.” The banging stopped and I heard a conversation between my brother and my mom. She wanted something and my brother, not wanting to deal with her that long, gave it to her. I cried as he didn’t realize that anything was wrong. He just continues playing games. I go over to the phone app on my phone and dial 911. Then I wake up in total darkness, still feeling that fear in me.

I’m weirded out by my dream because it seems so unrealistic. And I really want some advice on it seeing as I’m not so good with dreams. And it’s not like I could go to my mom with this dream because I’d feel awkward and not talk a lot.

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Wow that sounds horrific. I’m sorry you went through that. That’s not a good way to spend your sleep.

When I want to know more about vivid or recurring dreams, I google them. One site that pops up near the top is Dream Bible, and they usually have several pages outlining different nuanced scenarios in your dream. Can’t hurt to try :man_shrugging:

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Hi Panda,

It’s been a while since I actively studied dreams but it was something that my grama and I did for years a while back.

I would start by saying that death in a dream does not mean death and therefore the act of killing someone or attempting to kill someone shouldn’t be taken literal. Death, in dreams, signifies an intense need for drastic change in your life. I’m pretty new here so I don’t know your story but I feel like maybe there is a subconscious thought that you’re mom is trying to help you change your life, but because you have to defend yourself in your dream, perhaps you feel as though she is going about it the wrong way or is being abrasive in her ways.

Repetitive calls for help could mean that your subconscious mind wants to be helped but you feel that no matter what you do or who you talk you, you feel that they shrug you off, misunderstand you, or otherwise disregard your asking for help, as could be represented by everyone wearing headphones and therefore not hearing you or your cries.

Again, it’s been a while and I’m no professional but this is how I would interpret the dream. When I was at my worst I would have consistent, reoccurring dreams of myself dying or being killed which went away almost immediately after I left the place where I was being abused… Just some food for thought.

I hope you find some peace of mind, I can relate to how relentless those dreams can be. -hugs-

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Thank you! No worries about not remembering much about dream interpretation. You helped me out a lot. The dream gives me anxiety.

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I think a little part of calling out for help is that my older brother cheated on A and now she’s going to be moving soon. With my nephew. It’s a lot to be dealing with and I feel like she won’t be there to help me anymore. I’ll feel so alone.

Yes, this would also make sense seeing as how she vanished in your dream (I somehow overlooked this the first time I read your post.).

I’m glad I could help to some degree. In my experience dreams always look and feel far worse than what your subconscious mind is trying to tell you for whatever reason. At the same time, I’m sorry one of your sources of support is leaving. Perhaps you can exchange information and stay in touch? Maybe hang out regularly after Covid settles down a little? It sucks being alone and unfortunately these days with Covid (on top of everything else) a lot of people are feeling it. You will always have everyone here at Heart Support at least.