I really struggling

I recently started a new job where I have an incredible amount of pressure. My boss pretends to understand but she does not understand how to support me even though she’s a licensed therapist. I work multiple jobs so I can avoid dating anyone. I have severe seasonal affective disorder. All my family lives on the other side of the country, and I push people away cause I have been so hurt in the past. I’m feeling totally lost, and I don’t know what to do.

@Rambojones

It seems like you are dealing with a lot all at once, I think its awesome that you felt comfortable enough and safe enough to post here.
I too work multiple jobs and I know how hard it can be and also how easy it can make it to alienate yourself from other people…
Have you tried talking to your boss about not feeling supported? Or maybe talking to someone else (a therapist whose not your boss maybe), if you don’t feel comfortable talking to your boss?
As to feeling totally lost, is there something you enjoy doing that you could pour yourself into?

I feel like I don’t have a lot of advice to offer, but just know this community is always here for you!

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@Michellelena
Thanks for taking the time to read and respond. My therapist recently got her PhD so left the VA. I did have talked to my boss multiple times and she just doesn’t seem to get it. I am a Social Worker myself. I am new to this place and fear if I keep pushing that they will let me go. I have some ptsd from previous employers and it freaks me out so bad. When I say I don’t have anyone to talk to I am being serious. All I do when I’m not at work is lay in bed.

I am sorry that you boss doesn’t seem to be getting it, that must really suck and take it’s toll on you.
I too know the fear with knowing how far I can push in a job… I wish I had some kind of concrete solution or advice… but I am still walking that line myself.
I have found talking to a therapist that is completely removed from the situation helpful, but everyone is different. This community is always here for you though whenever you need.
Just know that you are not alone and I am hoping this will get better for you. Sorry I can’t offer anything more, but know that I am rooting for you.

@Michellelena

Thank you for all of your kind words.